To Two Too Much

Our English language is a challenge for so many people, not just those who are new to our country. There are so many sound alike words that seem to confuse and confound. They're in a quandary between their and there. Two times the confusion between to and too. It is bye-bye to a decision between buy and by. I struggle with lie, lay, and laid. Whether to say who or whom is also one I can't decide. Which reminds me of whether and weather. The list can be long. I think I usually make the correct decision. Do not say right if you are giving directions and are trying to tell them to go left. I learned the hard way that it is better to say correct rather than right. We ended up going the wrong way at a most difficult moment during a trip when I made the incorrect choice of words.

More will pop into my head before too long. This can get to be too too much. Not to or two much. What things have you seen others struggle with? We don't address something too somebody. We do write to the person. I did not do great in English, yet I can spot some things at a distance. I could not understand all the parts of a sentence, but I was good in spelling. I would not do great in a spelling bee though as I need to see the words and many are just too difficult. Notice I said spelling bee as it is not a spelling be.

There are words that are spelled the same way with different meanings. There is the name Bill as opposed to bill collectors. We wave to people and there are waves on the beach. I was just reminded of your and you're to be careful with when writing. There is fairy and ferry boat. I almost wrote their instead of there. I'm sure you can add to the list. I am now reminded of ad and add.

With some words the question is whether to write le as in puzzle and table or el as in angel. Of course there is also angle. Course and coarse can confound me at times. What a tangled web I weave. I guess I have dealt with this long enough. Just thought I would have some fun.

Trust in the Lord With All Your Heart

As I write I try to keep a positive tone to my words. It has not always been this way. I went through a long dry spell where I could not see the light at the end of the tunnel. This was many years ago and even though I have had struggles in more recent years I try to look at the positive side of life. We are truly blessed with knowing that God loves us and has provided the way for us to enjoy eternity with Him.

If I did not have the Lord in my life at this time I would be wallowing in a self pity party. There are so many things that can overwhelm the soul. As we get older our bodies are wearing out and we need a strong resolve to not give up. At the same time those we love are going through struggles of their own and may need our encouragement. I try to be the one who says the word of encouragement to my loved ones. In the past there were many who helped me along the way.

I had family there for me when my children were young and I needed an extra hand. I don't know how to say this without seeming to be negative about my husband, but I was basically the mother and father to our children. Paul faithfully held a steady job and he was always faithful to me. But I had a very difficult time and went into serious depression for a number of years. Paul did not know how to be the daddy that our children needed. If I said anything he would just say that he didn't do anything. Meaning he did not do anything wrong as far as he could see. I even tried to get help with this situation but had no success.

I did not intend to write about this at this time. I have put my thoughts on paper many times and torn up half of what I put on paper. I am mostly past those hurtful days but they sometimes come back to haunt me. When I see happy families I am jealous and that is not good. I love my husband and my children a lot and want the best for all of them. Thankfully my husband loves the Lord and we share the same values in most ways.

The main thing I wanted to write is about my dear daughter that is going through her own very difficult time. I am able to be most sympathetic and understanding on one hand. But on the other hand I miss having her available to talk to and really be able to communicate with her. She has always been close to me and we can share so much with each other. Problem is I depend on her and she is not well enough to be able to give that much of herself at this time. I am here for her, but mostly I can pray for her. I pray for the Lord to put His healing hand upon her and to put His loving arms around her. Thankfully she loves the Lord and puts her trust in Him.

Not only is my body wearing out, our house is showing it's age and needs a lot of loving care. Over the years we have done our best to do what is needed for the house, but things are multiplying and I need to be a better manager of time and talent. Thankfully Paul keeps the books. But so many things are on my list and not his list. We have sons who do what they can when they are able to be here. I often have a 'honey do list' for at least one of our sons when possible. Actually they each have their own ways of doing for us which are more interesting than what I ask them to do. One son fills our cupboard and refrigerator several times a year. The other son takes us on excursions when he is in town. They are appreciated. They are in my prayers each day.

I need to go to Colorado to see our other daughter and her family. I haven't even seen our great grandson yet. I am missing out on precious moments in time and I can only blame myself. I need to go get my identification updated so I can fly. I will figure out the funds when that time comes. Families are precious and I miss those days when we had our granddaughters here with us. I loved having them nearby when they were little. Thankfully they stay in touch with me on Facebook. I am so glad that they know the Lord.

By trusting in the Lord I get my mind off myself and think on things of greater importance. I can forgive the things which have been negatives in my life. I remember my dear sisters in Christ that were there for me when I was so needy. So many precious moments that I must not forget. How can I testify if I can't share the sad moments that make the happier moments so much more meaningful? Yet there are some things that are buried in the depths of the sea as the old chorus goes.

"Down in the depths of the deep blue sea lie all the sins once charged to me. Buried for time and eternity, down in the deep blue sea."   This is how I remember this old song we sang when I first knew the Lord.

School Days

I have a long list of ideas to write about, all good ideas, but it starts to look like a school assignment. Eventually I will write about each idea on my list, but that is for future reference. Why do school assignments seem so daunting? I was not the best student and often procrastinated writing those special reports that were so important. I actually ended up with neat folders with decent grades. I put a good last ditch effort into certain assignments. Some classes were fun, but others were a struggle for me.

Laura enjoyed some of the special assignments that she had to do. She was very neat and put a lot of effort into what she did. She has enjoyed writing as far back as I can remember. Like me, she did first grade twice. I think it was a good idea for me to repeat first grade and I hope Laura feels that it helped her to do the same. Some of us needed that extra help in learning to read and do first grade arithmetic.

Bill benefited from doing second grade twice, but I think that he started to shine in school when he was older and had new glasses. He went to an eye doctor once when he was three or four years old and nothing was found to cause concern. I should have taken him to our favorite optometrist to have his vision checked. When I finally took him to have his vision checked he needed special glasses. This helped him a lot. I think that is when he started doing real good in school. Bill and Laura, as well as their brother Griff, all do very good in math.

Griff did not seem to struggle with any subjects in school. In fact he was identified as gifted. His problem was that he may have felt that he knew more than the teachers at times. He may have been a challenge for the teachers in many ways. In high school he got to where he would not go to school after a while. When he was seventeen he got his GED and then he joined the Marines. He did the best possible on the test to join the Marines so of course they wanted him to enlist.

Our oldest daughter Kathy did her best and got good grades. In high school her favorite subject was probably homemaking. She had the opportunity to take four years of this class with one of our very favorite teachers, Mrs. Hanks. My sisters and I loved Mrs. Hanks and each of us learned to sew under her watchful eyes. I even visited this favorite teacher at school after I graduated. I took my baby Kathy to show off to Mrs. Hanks. It was a blessing for Kathy to also have this same homemaking teacher as I had.

Kathy was the third generation in our family to graduate from Coronado High School. Paul's parents, aunts and uncles all graduated from CHS. My Dad attended Coronado schools, but did not graduate. Some of Dad's siblings graduated from CHS. Paul and I, as well as his brother and my sisters, graduated from Coronado High School.

Laura graduated from Coronado Junior High (8th grade) and then we moved to South SanDiego (Otay Mesa). She went to Montgomery Junior High and then Montgomery High School, as did Bill and Griff. Laura had another Junior High graduation when she graduated from 9th grade at Montgomery. Bill and Griff were in 5th and 6th grades when we moved here. They attended Juarez Lincoln School near here. We can often hear the children playing in the schoolyard on the nearby hill reminding us of the good old school days.

"Reading and 'Riting and 'Rithmetic" are words to an old song we used to sing. There is a hickory stick in this old song, but none ever had to be used on me at school. That would have been a rare thing when I was growing up and was probably never done when my children were in school. I do remember my sister getting in trouble one time at the school we went to when we were on the farm. She was in first grade. All she had done was to refuse to eat something on her plate in the cafeteria. And when I made the mistake of mentioning it to my grandmother Donna got in trouble again at home. That's the way it was. I did not like some of the cafeteria food, but I choked it down.

Time on the playground with friends was one of my favorite things at school. I enjoyed jump rope, hop scotch and jacks. I did not do good at team sports. Playing on the monkey bars, or the bars you swing across hand over hand getting blisters along the way, is another memory. Those blisters were badges of skill.

We were lucky to have square dance classes at times over the years. There were other lessons in dancing too, all good old fashioned dances. I'm sure not everyone appreciated these lessons though. But I remember them being fun as I liked boys. We were still young enough that some of the kids probably did not care for the opposite sex. Not all of my children had these opportunities. Laura did not get to do this as she had a different class. I guess some of the children got to square dance. My husband Paul remembers these lessons from back when he was in school.

Paul and I never danced with each other except for trying to when we were first dating. I did a little bit of dancing when the opportunity was there with friends or classmates. Once in a while there would be a party at a friend's house. At one such party at my friend's house I was having fun, but must have eaten too many nuts or other goodies. The music was on and some of us decided to dance. I danced with one of the boys that was trying to enjoy his first dance. I so much wanted to enjoy this dance. Our dancing in those days was slow and together, with the music of the early fifties. It would have been fine if I felt good.

The dance was barely over when I started for the bathroom, but I did not make it. I threw up all over the floor right in front of my dance partner and the other kids there. Not a fun experience for the fine young man I had been dancing with a few seconds before. I felt so bad for him, not to ignore the fact I was embarrassed to have spoiled what should have been a fun evening.



Caroline's eighth grade graduation picture--Coronado, 1951

Fifty Six Years And Counting

Paul and I have been married for fifty six years and it will be fifty seven years in August. We started going together in September of 1953 before I turned seventeen. I was not yet eighteen when we married and he was not quite twenty one. We had to have our parents sign for us to get our marriage license. I remember going to the old San Diego courthouse with our mothers to get the license.

We were warned it would not be a bed of roses when we got married, but we did not want to hear that. We saw older couples walking their separate paces, not hand in hand. That was not going to be us. We were two kids in love and ignored any negatives of what might be in store for us.

Paul was always the quiet one and I was the talker. He did not always want to go where I wanted to go so I missed some activities with friends to be with him. But we were blind to the implications. I was determined to marry him. It was going to be a happy family with cute cottage and white picket fence for me. That is all I ever wanted. I was never one to be a party girl even though I enjoyed being with my friends. They would not be put before my husband.

We had a sweet wedding in the Methodist Church in Coronado where we were active with our friends. We had been in the youth fellowship for some time. I taught a kindergarten class in Sunday School there. The ladies of the church were so good to us and set up the wedding reception and provided what was needed. They also gave me a nice gift. Mom and Dad purchased the cake and bouquets for the wedding and reception. My sister Donna and I made our dresses for the wedding. Donna was my Maid of Honor, my only attendant. Paul's brother Charlie was the Best Man. We had friends to be ushers. Two friends sang for the wedding. There were around one hundred people in attendance. It was nicer than we had originally planned.

Our Pastor was on his annual vacation so we asked a favorite retired minister to officiate at the wedding. But before the big day he had a bad experience at the dentist and ended up with a broken jaw. His wife was also a retired minister so she was able to do the wedding for us. They were a sweet couple who had their golden anniversary that same year.

My Uncle George paid a friend of his to be the photographer at the wedding and reception so we have nice pictures of our special day. My sister Betty attended the guest book. It is fun to look at this book now and remember August 15, 1954. We used the same book at our golden wedding anniversary celebration in 2004, also on August 15th at two o'clock PM. Both big days were on a Sunday.

After the reception Paul's brother took us to the motel in San Diego where we would spend the next five days. Paul had to work as he had no vacation time. He was working for the city of San Diego and had not been there long enough to even take time for a honeymoon. So we did the best we could by getting a motel across the street from his job at the old city administration building on Pacific Highway. The city and county shared the same building then. It is the county administration building now.

Our friends were mostly teenagers and wanted to have some fun. They were determined to discover our "honeymoon" location. The motel manager knew we did not want to be disturbed, but our friends pretty much figured out where we were and kept calling. The manager got tired of the calls and finally came to our door one evening to have me go to the office to take a call. Not good timing as I had to throw a robe on and head to the office a few doors down. Paul was comfortable in bed with the blankets pulled up high, and I did not pull the door shut as I should. Some kids stood there and stared at him and he could not do a thing about it. I learned a lesson that day that has stayed with me all these years. Properly close doors. We have never shared this story with anyone before as far as I can remember.

We enjoyed our time in San Diego that week during the hours that Paul was not at work. He also got away from work during lunchtime. We enjoyed eating dinner at a nice restaurant on the same block as the motel. We also went to other favorite restaurants. That was our big luxury.

Back in Coronado we stayed at our dear friend Rosalie's house for a week or two while she was out of town. We also stayed at Paul's parents house while they were on a vacation. Paul's brother was still at home and I tried to cook for him as well as us. I was still learning to cook so I'm sure Charlie was happy when his mother was back in the kitchen. We finally got a little garage apartment on C Avenue, in the alley. It was near Paul's aunt's home on C Avenue.

We were supposed to move to San Diego as Paul was working for the city of San Diego. He was just in a temporary type of job unless they decided to keep him. It is a good thing we stayed in Coronado near family and friends as his job didn't become permanent. I was still in school in Coronado. It was scary to not have steady income. He got a number of small jobs along the way. One job was working for Whitney's Department Store in San Diego during the Christmas Season. He worked in the mail room. He liked the people he worked with as he did when he worked for the city.

We did not have money to spare for Christmas gifts or any extras. I so much wanted to get him a new Bible for Christmas. It was a new translation and the church had some available. Our Pastor knew that I wanted to do this. On Christmas, or the day before, we had a surprise visit from one of our church friends. He brought the Bible that I wanted to give Paul. What a sweet blessing.

Before that, in October, I wanted to do something for his birthday. There were no funds so I got creative. I wrote a poem for him. I wish I knew where to find it now, but maybe it would not be what I remember it to be. Paul did not really appreciate poetry, even what was written for him. I was warned it would not be a bed of roses. I think he might have liked the kittens I brought home, around that time, a little better than the poetry. We have always had cats ever since then.

I remember when our cupboard was bare and we had an invite to one of our parents homes for dinner. He did not want to go. Did not matter that a home cooked meal sounded so good to me. Maybe that was the first fight. Actually we rarely fought. Would not have done much good. In those days I pretty much did what he wanted to do. I probably took a while to learn to go without him. It would be nicer to do things together if possible.

My dream was to do things together like my parents did. They even worked together. I thought all couples helped each other as my parents did. Oh, it was not a bed of roses for them either, but they were together. They had some serious fights though. I can remember my whole family washing the car together which made doing the job fun. Paul was not going to fall into that pattern.

Paul's mother bought us a board game for our first Christmas. Her idea was so nice, that we would have something fun to do together. We never played that game. In all the years we have been together about the only time just the two of us played a game together we had a tie. How funny. We have played some games with our dear friends, Madeline and her late husband Steve. They have been about the only people to be able to get him to go along with the planned games. I used to play a lot of games with our children.

This is not a bashing husbands blog post. I love my husband dearly and am glad we are still together after all these years. We almost got divorced at one time. We were apart for half a year and had started the divorce process. I'm so glad that we did not go through with what we had started. We actually need each other. It has not been easy, even after getting back together. But there are more pluses than minuses.

I may not have my white picket fence but I am happy where I'm at. Mainly I know where my final home will be. I have a home waiting for me in heaven with Jesus. I would not have been so confident of this when I was first married. I had not understood that we needed a personal relationship with our Lord. I was blind, but now I see. If it weren't for Paul I may have wandered in darkness longer. Even though we always went to church I did not necessarily hear the message. Thankfully I had a praying grandmother. I also married a Christian. Paul may not be perfect, but none of us are. And he does not complain about me. I am blessed. He does not fuss at me. I may fuss but he keeps his mouth shut.

It wasn't until 1961, when we were the parents of three children, that we joined the First Baptist Church in Coronado. Our fourth child would be born almost two years later in December of 1962. So the children mainly grew up going to our favorite little church in Coronado.

My prayer is that each of our children would know the Lord and follow Him all the days of their lives. I pray for the very best for my husband, for health and strength, for comfort and joy. Thankfully he reads the Bible and prays daily. He is very organized in his plans for this each day. He has always kept a daily log  of what he does. Originally it was a journal and now he writes in a Daytimer or a notebook. I would love to be so consistent.

My heart and hugs go to my dear husband and my children. And hugs to each one that reads my writings. Love you  :)

"A man shall cling to his wife and the two shall become one" is the verse on the front of the invitation to our daughter Kathy and her husband John's wedding.

My First Mother's Day

In May of 1956 I was looking forward to my first Mother's Day. Paul was in Korea and would not be home to celebrate this special day with me. In fact he would be away until the following spring. Kathy had been born in August of 1955 and her daddy had only seen her on two short visits home. It would have been a lonely time for me, but I had my family nearby and I kept busy. I loved being a mother despite my very young age. I was just eighteen years old when Kathy was born. I was nineteen that December.

My sisters were often with me and enjoyed the role of being aunts. Donna and Betty were in high school. Donna was a senior and Betty was a sophomore at Coronado High School. Donna had some friends that were planning a bridal shower for one of her good friends. Since Donna was at my house more than she was at home with Mom and Dad she invited her friends to use my house for the shower. My sisters and I did not do anything to get into trouble. In fact we went to Sunday School and Church. We did not drink or smoke. We may have tried these things at one time, but we did not enjoy them.

It was the evening before Mother's Day when the shower was held at my house. I barely knew Donna's friends. They planned an after shower party too and that didn't sound good to me, but I was promised all would be well. The bridal shower went well. Then a bunch of friends of Donna's friends showed up. I was not outspoken as I would be now days. I was intimidated by these people. And I had laryngitis so could barely speak. I hid out in my room. There was only a curtain for a door between the front room and my bedroom so I was aware of the drinking. When they started throwing up I gained enough strength to say "get out of my house."

My neighbors certainly did not appreciate what was happening. I think somebody even called the police. They would not have known I was an innocent victim in all of this. The police may have talked to some of the kids outside, but I was not approached. Actually some of the kids knew the police so nothing happened. I'm not discrediting the police though, as I don't know for sure what took place. The next morning I saw evidence of the drinking in my yard. What would my neighbors think of me now? I never knew.

The next morning I got up as I did every Sunday morning and got little Kathy and myself ready for church. It was my first Mother's Day. I was not about to miss church.

Over the years I was impressed with the mothers being honored on Mother's Day during church. There would be flowers for the mother with the most children. There were flowers for the oldest mother. And there were other honors including the youngest mother. I just knew I would be honored for being the youngest mother. How could anyone else be the youngest mother there that day? I was also faithful in being there. I was even there on a day that I was sick with a sore throat. I had to be there. It was my first Mother's Day.

You can probably see this coming. The mother with the youngest baby got the flowers instead. My baby was eight months old. There was a mother with a new baby and she was recognized. I was hoping nobody realized that I was disappointed. I wanted to save face. I guess I was cool about it. My moment was not to be. Hopefully I learned something positive in this experience.

As I got older I knew not to expect laurels for just doing my job. The best I can receive is knowing my children appreciate me. It is an honor to be the mother of my four dear children. It is an extra blessing to be a grandmother and a great grandmother. Love to each one. Hugs  :)

Challenges

We are challenged daily and maybe that is good as we at least know we are among the living. Our kitties are a real challenge. This morning as we were heading out the door to go to church two of the cats wanted out and we were determined to keep them in. Paul was struggling with Midnight while Laura and I were trying to go out the door without any cats. Spotty flew past me across my sandals and snagged my stockings on the way. So much for those stockings, but I had no choice except to wear them one last time. I sealed the runs with clear polish and headed out again. By then two cats had gotten outside. That is the way it is at our house.

We want to be good neighbors and not have our cats bother other people. Some of the kitties used to be able to go in and out as they please, but we have tried to change that. After Cassandra got hit and died on Palm Avenue we pretty much made our cats indoor cats, though not always successful. This wasn't the first tragedy with our kitties, but we hope it is the last. This was at least five years ago. Actually Cassandra really belonged to our neighbor. We loved her and took part ownership of her. Laura took beautiful pictures of her.

When we got Spotty he was an indoor kitty. It didn't take long for him to discover our yard. I don't think he wanders though. I certainly hope not.

I spend more time cleaning up after pets than I ever remember doing for our children. It is like having more than one two year old at a time. I won't go into details about the cleaning challenges as they are many. Thankfully Paul cleans the litter boxes. And now we have the flea season upon us and need to get rid of them. I will be visiting Pet Smart soon.

I could talk about repairs we need to do around here as they are another challenge. But I won't bother with that subject for now. At least we have a home and are comfortable enough. We have food in our cupboards and refrigerator. We are blessed.

This morning we had a very nice worship service at Westview Bible Church. Pastor Carey gave a good gospel message. No one in attendance can give the excuse that they did not know they needed the Lord to cover their sin. "For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God."Romans 3:23. "For the wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Jesus Christ our Lord." Romans 6:23. Our Savior conquered the grave. We set our hope on Jesus rising from the grave- the greatest truth the world has ever known. Death is a certain reality- we need the hope of knowing Jesus. The free gift of life is in Jesus Christ. He paid the full penalty and we need to believe in Jesus There is only ONE WAY. Beware of false prophets. He is our only hope.

Pastor Carey gave good illustrations to get his point across. I always take notes but not every word. The sermon was good as Paul just said to me. I would like to be able to share the message as clearly as he says it. I'm sure lives are touched by the message each week.

After church we had an Easter brunch in the fellowship hall. Many went outside and found seats there to eat their meal. We sat with our friend Adria during the meal. She had her husband Al with her today. He lives in a nursing home in El Cajon. She wants to get him in a place in Chula Vista so she doesn't have so far to go to spend time with him. She is challenged daily and she stays so positive. She has M.S. and has a lot going on in her life. She is such a dear person.

We had a ride home with our friends Ellen and Dave. We have been blessed to get to know them. I first met Ellen on the bus. Paul and I were heading to Coronado to church every week and she was going to Westview. We are now going with her to church. We already knew Adria and have made new friends there. I am challenged as I still want to be part of my Coronado church family too. We go there sometimes. There will always be challenges in life and many decisions to make as long as we breathe.

The most important decision is to accept Jesus as Lord and Savior while we still have breath in us. We know some who have made that decision on their deathbeds. They will receive eternal life just as the ones who have always lived for Christ. But I think the bigger blessing is to know Him and live for Him now. We can spend time serving Him and sharing His love with others. Do not wait till it is too late. After we take our final breath it is too late to make this decision. God loves us and wants what is best for us. But He does not force us to make this decision. God Bless.

A Story To Remember

Paul had a good friend that he knew from work named Ron. They had been friends for many years and shared a lot of history together. Ron shared mumps with Paul in 1960 as he did not stay home from work when he was sick. When Paul got sick he knew to stay at home and not share it at work. But he shared the mumps with the girls and me. I was pregnant with Bill when I had the mumps. Thankfully I did not have a real bad case and my baby was fine.

The next experience we shared with Ron was when he made arrangements for us to be baptized in the ocean at Rosarito Beach. Ron and his wife had been baptized by the pastor of the Mexican church that they occasionally attended. Ron's wife was from Tijuana so they knew the people of this little Church of God in the hills south of the border. Ron was excited about the Lord, as was Paul. I was just beginning to understand the need for a personal walk with the Lord even though I had been in church and Sunday school all of my life.

I was in the Methodist church in those days. It was a whole new experience to be with people from the Church of God. We were not changing churches, we were just wanting to be baptized in the ocean. I expected to just go down there and be baptized and come home. I was missing a picnic at my church to do this. What I experienced was more memorable than a picnic. When we got to the little church in the hills of Tijuana they were prepared to baptize us in their baptistry. But this was not what Paul and Ron had planned. It was quickly arranged for us to travel to Rosarito Beach for the baptism despite the fact that this would not be as easy for the pastor.

We all got into the back of an old van or panel truck. This included a number of people from the church and Ron's family as well as Paul, our two little girls and me. There could have been several vehicles going along with us. This was 1960 and there was not any freeway or other major highway then. I am not very familiar with that area as I have only been that far south twice in my life. I can tell you that things did not look anything like pictures I see of that area now. On the way to the beach we stopped to visit an elderly couple who were about 100 years old. (Or maybe ninety) We got to know the lovely people of the church as we were squeezed together in the van. We may not have spoken the same language, but that made no difference. I remember one little boy that had survived major surgery as an infant. His family shared the story with us.

At the beach we were near the old hotel that has been there for years. There were not too many people on the beach, but the people that were there witnessed something they would not be used to seeing. I mean that most people from that region would be Catholic so would not witness beach baptisms. I had not even seen one before that date. The Pastor waded out with Paul and me into the cold water. He spoke only Spanish and we only knew English, but the Lord knew what was on our hearts.

It was late when we got home that day. We were tired, but it was a day to remember. A few days later we went back to the little church in Tijuana for them to extend the hand of fellowship to us. We were not joining their church, but they wanted to give us hugs anyway. This was in the days before we were used to hugs. That did not matter as they were so kind to us.

The next year, early in 1961, Paul and I decided to join the First Baptist Church in Coronado. I had a good Baptist grandma and went to her church when I lived with her as a child. Paul and I were attracted to the Baptist church when they had evangelists visiting there each year.

Fast forward ten years. Ron and his wife were not together anymore. He lived the bachelor life for awhile and then met Grace. Ron had a good life with Grace, but he became very sick with Hodgkins. He had this illness for sometime and he may have been in remission at one period of time. Then in 1973 the time came for him to go to be with the Lord.

Paul was asked to be a pall bearer at Ron's funeral. Paul sat with the other pall bearers and I sat alone. When it was time for people to go forward and pass by the casket the usher directed me to the front. I paid my respects and did not pay enough attention where I was to go next. I was at the head of the line and made a wrong turn. I opened a door and others followed me. Oops, I was in the janitor's closet with others tagging along behind me. How do you save face in this situation? You don't. You just grin and bear it. It would have been easier to be a pall bearer.

Then we got lost on the way to the cemetery so Paul and I never saw any of those people ever again. I don't know if that was for the best or not. They probably forgot me, but I have a story to remember.

image credits:Brenden Ashton;  ksbuehler

Bits and Pieces of Life - January 2011

I still can't even start a new post unless Laura is here to help me. I get so frustrated because I do the same thing as she does and it doesn't work for me. All I get is a page that has nothing to do with starting a new post. Learning new things has always been hard for me. If Laura wasn't here I wouldn't even be on the computer.

Fred gets frustrated because Donna doesn't learn how to use the computer, but she doesn't have someone like Laura to teach her. Fred wouldn't have the time to put into teaching her. He doesn't even have time to go to his Facebook page. His computer is for work, not fun.

Poor Bill, his laptop computer is not working at this time. He needs it for all of his birding and other records. He spends a lot of time on it when it works. I hope the cats didn't do something to it when they jumped across it. He says it was already having problems so they are not the cause. This is not his first laptop as some don't last long for him.

I get ideas to write about, but when I sit at the computer those ideas take flight. Today I put some ideas on paper since I'm sharing about a friend at her memorial service on Saturday. Kathy was my friend that I played Scrabble with. I knew her since our boys were in 5th or 6th grade together. She was a neighbor on the street in back of us. Her husband Ron is still our friend. They always welcomed friends into their home and knew how to give a party which they did many times over the years.

We have been enjoying having Bill with us since he arrived from Florida on Christmas. We have been to the desert, the mountains, Lindo Lake in Lakeside and to Griff's in Valley Center. Bill has taken his Dad birding many times in recent weeks. They have been to all the local birding spots. Bill has gone out with Laura on excursions too. This morning while Bill and Paul were out birding Laura and I took a short walk to a favorite neighborhood spot overlooking the Otay Valley.

On Saturday we had company here. My cousin Dagna and her husband Joe were here on their annual visit with us. Actually we saw Dagna another time last summer when Kathy and John were here. Donna and Fred were also here on Saturday as they were in town for a wedding. They were able to enjoy tamales with us that Dagna and Joe brought for dinner. Donna and Fred were here for a short time when they had to head to the wedding of Fred's niece. Last time they were in town it was for his brother's funeral.

There is always something going on, it seems. I also enjoy quiet days at home. I do a little housework too. But I need to do a lot more housework. It is good to have company to make me do a little extra work. There is never an end to things that need to be done.

We had a problem that Paul had to solve by phone last week. We had changed health insurance providers in December but the old one did not get canceled as it should have. The whole idea was that we couldn't afford the old one. When he first called about it he was told that it was too late to cancel and he was given the run around with voice mail. That is a bad thing to happen to any senior. He finally got hold of someone who could help him late last week so the problem is solved after many sleepless nights on my part. We couldn't just withhold payment as it automatically came out of his pay before it got to the bank. Thankfully things look better now. Hopefully they really are.

We had a nice day yesterday as we enjoyed church and then went with friends to Arby's afterwards. We had talked with Ellen and Dave for several weeks about doing this. Ellen is my good friend from Westview Bible Church that I originally met on the bus. We met her when we were heading to Coronado on Sundays and she was also riding the bus. It has been a blessing to know Ellen and Dave and to go to church with them. We have made other friends at Westview too. We already knew Adria, another dear friend.

I want to get together with my dear friend Madeline soon. We are long overdue on doing this, not any fault of hers. I don't know when we can work this out. She would like to see Bill while he is here. I hope for the best. Madeline, if you read this I will call soon.

We also promised Rosalie we would go see her soon. She is "my other mother" and Madeline is "my other sister". Donna and I both "adopted" Rosalie when we were teen agers to be our "other mother". But we haven't been very good daughters in recent years. We get busy and time slips away.

Lucia "adopted" me to be her "other mother" as her family is in Colombia. She was able to see them recently when they were in California on vacation. She also went with Michael and Sabrina to Oklahoma to see his family for Christmas so they have been on the go. We need to get together soon.

I recently sent birthday cards to two of my nephews and to Josie. I could have sent another nephew a card too but didn't have his current address. Josie was our daughter-in-law, but we still consider her to be family.

Such is the life of this senior citizen. This wasn't about any one thing, just bits and pieces of life. And I didn't even touch on everything. I really need patience with problems I face each day. Best of all, I love my friends and family.  Hugs.  :)

New Years Blessings- 2011

It is New Years Eve, Friday, December 31, 2010. I was thinking about things people do to begin the New Year.  The other day when we were walking at LaJolla Cove we saw some swimmers going into the cold Pacific Ocean. It was nine in the morning and I was wearing a jacket. But those faithful swimmers were doing their morning ritual no matter the weather. I can picture them jumping into the icy waters on the first day of the year. We see pictures of people in the news doing their Polar plunge each year. I'll stay in my warm jacket and watch the brave souls. Makes me shiver thinking about them.

Laura and I read the book, "Swimming to Antarctica," by Lynne Cox. She is a long distance swimmer and likes the challenge of very cold water. It was an enjoyable book, but I'll leave the endurance records to her and just read about it. I admire people who get out there and challenge themselves like that.

Bruce, Charlie, Swede, Clarence

Paul's brother loves to go cycling every day. Charlie and some of his friends who are all in their 70s, except one may be in his 60s, enjoy an annual cycling trip together. They have done the Rockies in Canada and points south. This year they were in the North Cascades. Each year they will be a little more south during their excursion. They impress me each year as they continue this tradition of pedaling up hill and down for great distances and enjoying the scenery. These fine gentlemen are all graduates of Coronado High School.

Some people begin the year on a birding expedition. That is bird watching to most people. Paul and our son Bill enjoy starting the year this way. The idea is to see how many varieties of birds you can get in a day, or a month, or the year. Paul has a thing about lists so he has lists for each excursion, each month and each year. Plus whatever other list he comes up with. Then some people just enjoy the birds and don't bother with lists. There are people who do an official bird count this time of the year too. Paul used to go on bird walks with the Audubon Society and really enjoyed this activity. When you are with other birders you can find more birds as others may see or hear one that you would not have otherwise. Paul enjoys going with our son as Bill has a good eye and ear for birds. Laura enjoys seeing the birds too.

I'm glad that Bill takes his dad birding as I get to go places and see things I wouldn't get to do otherwise. We get to go to the mountains, the desert and many of the nice coastal areas in San Diego. When we had a car we would be able to do some of these things all through the year. Now we depend on going with family or friends for these adventures. But there are local things to do on the bus. Sometimes we go to the I.B. pier or other nearby walking areas. We need to do this more often.

Some people ring in the New Year with parties or fireworks. Some stay home and watch the festivities on T.V. We are doing good to be awake at midnight. I hope all of my friends and family face the New Year with the Joy of the Lord and may you enjoy the Peace that only He can give. Maybe some are going to ring in the New Year by singing and praying with other believers at the church of their choice. Do remember to count your blessings. Hugs :)

Paul's Surgery - December 2000

Ten years ago Paul was in the hospital awaiting heart surgery. On Christmas 2000 we enjoyed a family Christmas with my sister and brother-in-law here from L.A. in addition to Paul, Laura, Griff and me. Paul's Uncle El and at least one other relative had dropped by for a visit that day too. This reminded me of some of our previous multi-generation Christmases in years past.

In the late afternoon, after most of the family had gone home, Paul and Griff were moving some large logs onto Griff's truck. We had cut down a large tree earlier in the year and were trying to make use of the remaining logs. This was also the year that Paul knew he needed to eventually have heart surgery. After helping to move the logs Paul said that maybe he shouldn't have done that and then he fell. I asked him if I should call 911 and he said no.

He got up and tried to walk toward the house but didn't get very far when he crashed and bumped his head and was definitely in trouble. We didn't ask him this time if he needed help. 911 was called and he was taken to UCSD Medical Center in Hillcrest as they have a trauma unit at that hospital. Thankfully Griff was still here as he was able to take Laura and me to the hospital.

Paul would be staying at the hospital at least overnight. The next day it was determined that he had a heart attack. All tests verified what we already knew, that he needed his aortic heart valve replaced. He probably needed bypass surgery too. Surgery was scheduled for the next to last day of the year.

On Saturday, December 30th Madeline and Steve took Laura and me to the hospital, and they waited and prayed with us while Paul spent many hours in surgery. Griff came from Valley Center to be with us too. Pastor Larry joined us in the long wait to find out how Paul was doing. When the surgeon finally finished the operation he came to tell us that Paul's heart valve had been replaced along with a double bypass and an aneurysm repaired in his aorta. The valve had been the worst one he had seen in his years as a surgeon. He would have done a triple bypass but Paul had spent enough time in surgery.

Paul was healing as expected and it would not be long till he could go home. But on January 2nd and then again two days later he had cardiac arrest. Each time he had to be shocked back into normal heart rhythm. One of those times he actually had two cardiac failures and was shocked back a third time. It is with much appreciation from me that the nurses did a good job. Imagine waking up to the phone call in the middle of the night that your loved one had been through this trauma. Thankfully Paul survived this crisis.

One morning when I went to visit him there were a number of heart doctors around his bed deciding what to do to prevent this from happening again. It was decided to implant a defibrillator-pacemaker, so on the 8th this procedure was done. He was in the hospital for three weeks, from Christmas until January 16th. He began 2001 in the hospital. He had not been allowed out of bed at all during those three weeks so needed to regain his strength to be able to walk again. He had a visiting nurse to check on him for a short time, as well as an occupational therapist to be sure he was ok.

I could end the saga here, but I want to share how God provides. Laura and I almost always had a ride to go see Paul in the hospital. It didn't matter whether it was raining or not, and we had a number of rainy days at that time. Friends and family took time out of their busy days to go see Paul and to take us to Hillcrest to the hospital. We barely had to use public transportation to make the trip. I remember going by bus on January 1st and making very good connections so even that day was a blessing. I don't remember any days with bad connections.

Then five years later when Paul broke his ankle we again experienced God's provision with rides each week. Paul needed to go to UCSD Medical Center in Hillcrest each week to have his ankle checked. He had surgery on his ankle and the incision was slow in healing so this was a concern. This meant a new cast every week for some time even though the bone was healing nicely. This also meant a need for a ride every week which we had from different friends and family. Paul was in a wheelchair for several months that time. And the wheelchair was from a neighbor. We are certainly blessed.  :)

A Time to Keep and a Time to Throw Away

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:
    a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot,
    a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build,
    a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance,
                   a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
    a time to embrace and a time to refrain, a time to search and a time to give up,
                      a time to keep and a time to throw away,
     a time to tear and a time to mend, a time to be silent and a time to speak,
     a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace."
                                                                                     Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

We recognize the seasons of life, as we have often read in this passage from Ecclesiastes. We see in this book of the Bible that life has no meaning without God. "Meaningless! Meaningless! says the Teacher. Utterly meaningless!...What does man gain from all his labor at which he toils under the sun? Generations come and generations go, but earth remains forever."  Ecclesiastes 1:2-4

Then we see that a life lived for God is as it should be. "He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the hearts of men...there is nothing better for men than to be happy and do good while they live...and find satisfaction in all his toil- this is the gift of God...everything God does will endure forever, nothing can be added to it and nothing taken from it. God does it so that men will revere him."  Ecclesiastes 3:11-14

When we went through Mom's things in 1996 we learned the meaning of "a time to keep and a time to throw away." Mom grew up when you didn't throw anything away and she really took that to heart. We had a major job on our hands. I'm still finding her treasures amongst my belongings. Then a few years later we went through Paul's Dad's belongings. He had things more in order so it wasn't such a difficult task. Yet there were still precious belongings to go through.

We went through a time of searching and a time of giving up as we dealt with our parents' treasures. What to keep and what to give away was of importance. We realized that you can't take it with you when you go to meet your Maker. It felt like that is what Mom wanted to do.

I hope I follow the example of loved ones who set their eyes on God and lived for Him. I know that we have a beautiful heritage of Christians in our family that are not to be forgotten. We have grandparents and others who we will see in Glory. We may weep when they leave the confines of their earthly bodies, but they are in heaven singing and praising the Lord. "A time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance." Let us all prepare for days of rejoicing with the saints in heaven.

Image credits: striatic; igorzoid

Lessons Learned.........Part Four

61. One sweet lesson I learned was being a mother-in-law. Kathy's husband John quickly became part of our family. And just a year later, besides becoming a grandmother, I was also blessed with a sweet daughter-in-law. Griff was in the Marines and spent a year in Okinawa. He had the opportunity to visit the Philippines where he met Josie. They were married after he was able to bring her to the states. We became very close and she considered us to be her family since her family was so far away.We shared holidays together as well as other happy times. They never had any children. They were both hard workers and saved up for their long awaited house. But after sixteen years of marriage we received the very sad news that they were not together any more.

62. Eventually Josie met John and they got married. After a number of years they became parents to their cute little Joshua. Despite the fact we are not blood relatives I am Grandma to a sweet little boy. They were in Escondido until they moved to Colorado to be near her sister a year and a half ago when Joshua was not yet two years old. We stay in touch and I got to see them when we were in Colorado this year. They were also in San Diego one time this summer, mainly to see John's ailing father. I pray that they are raising Joshua to know that God is love.

63. We are going to be great grandparents to Becky and Jason's baby boy before this year is over. Becky is now twenty six years old, is married and expecting baby Jacob. Rebecca in the Bible had Jacob and our Rebecca is also having Jacob. They live in Colorado where Becky's family has been since the early '90s when Becky's Dad retired from the Navy. It has not been easy being a long distance grandma. There have been visits to Colorado, and some visits by their family to see us in San Diego. More bus adventures by me to go see them. Laura went with me on the bus once. There have also been several car trips, each a story in itself. I have also gotten used to flying though it is not my favorite thing to do. I have years that I don't get to go to see them. When the girls were in kindergarten and third grade Laura spent most of a school year there so she could help with their care when their parents were working. And now they are all grown up. Melissa is learning to be a preschool teacher. She loves the Lord and her church and friends.

64. Michael has three children but we don't have any contact with them. Kathy and John have barely had opportunity to see them. They would love to though. I saw the oldest one once when she was two and Michael was still with the mommy of his children. I briefly saw the other little girl on two separate occasions. I have not seen Michael's son, little Michael. I would have welcomed the chance to be a grandma to them. They do have grandparents and a great grandmother that care a lot for them. I pray that they get to go to Sunday School and to learn about Jesus.

65. Without knowing the Lord we don't really know the purpose of being here. Even if we love Jesus we sometimes take our eyes off Him and things can go downhill fast. Most of us have gone through these valleys. I have been through a dark valley in the past and only the Lord could change my course.

66. "The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.  He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.  He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.  Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

"Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.  Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever."  Psalm 23

67. Another lesson we need to learn is forgiveness. Before being forgiven we should be forgiving. I have a problem of not forgetting and that can interfere with forgiving. The Bible tells us that we should forgive the debts of others just as He forgives our debts. God is merciful to us and we need to show mercy to others.

68.We need to let our light shine before men. We need to be a reflection of God's light to the world.

69. Memorizing Bible verses is not easy but we sometimes do it without realizing it. Many songs we sing in church contain scripture and we learn these songs. We remember Bible stories from childhood. These contain Bible verses that we may know. With repetition we can learn.

70. The most recent verse I memorized is James 5:16. "Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective." This is the NIV translation. I use King James for verses I learned earlier.

71. "Blessed are the pure in heart, for they will see God." Matthew 5:8

72. When we were young Christians, and also young parents, we were very much into Christian music. We bought some good records and surrounded ourselves with some favorite old songs and hymns. We listened to George Beverly Shea and Stewart Hamblen as well as other favorites. We didn't hear the popular songs of the day and didn't have a TV so weren't familiar with a lot of 60s songs. I could follow along with "It is no secret what God can do, What He's done for others He'll do for you..." We were blessed with hearing this song again on Sunday at Westview Bible Church.

73. I was blessed with being challenged to learn to lead our Ladies Bible Study at First Baptist Church.  I was used to teaching children for most of my life, but I preferred them very young and did not have skills to lead adults in Bible study. I felt led by the Lord to restart the Ladies Bible Study that did not have someone to lead it. It had been a year since our previous leader had moved. I was so happy to facilitate this group of dear ladies for a number of years. Eventually others stepped in and took turns leading this group. We are always adjusting to change since First Baptist is mostly military and members come and go. There are some old timers like Paul and me and that is good. But we welcome newcomers each week with open arms. Westview is similar but I think there are more old timers there.

74. In celebrating my 74th birthday next month I want to remember that life is always full of changes and challenges. What will the next year bring? Will I meet my maker? I love Jesus and have confessed my sins to my Lord, and know that He will forgive us if we repent and turn to Him. I have put my faith in Him and believe in my heart that I am saved. I am looking forward to more adventures and being able to spend time with loved ones. I'm anxious to meet baby Jacob and any future great grandchildren. Another four generation picture would be nice. But I am ready to sing with the saints in Heaven someday.  :)