Nephews and Nieces

God's plan for families is one of the nicest things to have ever happened. When God put Adam and Eve together in the Garden of Eden and told them to be fruitful and multiply this was the beginning of marriage and families. We see families throughout the Bible. There are fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, sisters and brothers, and nephews and nieces. There are grandparents, aunts and uncles. Each one of these family members can be an important part of the family.

Today I want to tell about my nephews and nieces. I became an aunt when my sister Donna gave birth to her son Arthur Louis Sinclair on September 29, 1957. He is named after his father Louis Arthur Sinclair. I was already the mother of two year old Kathy at that time. Arthur was a beautiful baby boy, the first grandson on both sides of his family. In just one year and one day he would become the big brother to his sister Debra Marie Sinclair. She was given her mother's middle name Marie. We called her Debbie all through her childhood until she preferred being called Debra. She was as cute as any baby could possibly be. My daughter Laura was right in the middle of Arthur and Debra as far as birth order goes.

Donna's family lived in Los Angeles and we lived in San Diego so we did not see each other as often as I would have liked. Paul and I rarely went to L.A. Donna and Louis got to San Diego on special occasions or several times a year with their two little ones. The cousins enjoyed getting together as they got older and got to know each other better. There would soon be more cousins to add to the mix.

The next addition to the cousins was when my sister Betty had Gary. My handsome nephew Gary Edward was born February 19, 1960. He was an exuberant little boy, with a lot of personality. Laura really loved him a lot as one of her favorite cousins when they were little. Gary would become the big brother when Elizabeth Frances Hamilton was born on July 4th in 1961. She has her mother's middle name Frances. Elizabeth is also a family name. She was called Sissy for much of her childhood. Her family also called her Liz. My son Paul William, aka Bill, fits right in between Gary and Elizabeth age wise.

In December of 1962 I had my second son Griffith H. Marvin, aka Griff. The next baby would be another boy, Matthew Scott Hamilton, brother of Gary and Elizabeth. Matthew was born October 22, 1963. Betty and Sam now have three children, all born in California. One more son would be born in January of 1967 in Hawaii where Sam was stationed with the Navy. Mark Anthony would be child number four, the third son. They would move to Billings, Montana soon after Sam got out of the Navy the summer of 1967 while Mark was a baby. This is where the children would be raised.

When Betty and Sam and family were in San Diego, off and on during the Navy years, our children had chances to get to know each other. In later years after the Hamiltons moved to Billings they made trips to San Diego for family reunions. Gary spent time here the summer of 1973 with his grandma, my mother. He also helped us when we were moving that summer. I remember him with paint brush in hand along with my kids, his cousins. Elizabeth came to San Diego to visit her grandmother the spring of 1980 and ended up at our house for five years. Her dog Mouse joined our menagerie of cats, dogs and turtles.

Matthew has made several trips to visit us over the years. The year my Kathy was getting married Matthew came and helped immensely with putting the food out at the wedding reception. We had other help, but really needed Matthew's extra helping hands. Elizabeth was here then too and she had been involved with us in planning everything for the big day. It was her bright idea to make the mints. As for Matthew he actually prefers to be called Phinwe, but he has always been Matthew to us. Matthew the nephew with style. His color is black and he wears it well.

Mark was only here as a child with his parents. Mark has a sweet disposition whenever I do get to see him. He is the father of Brittany and Michael. They are both grown up now, and Brittany is in college and works for a vet. Elizabeth also has two children. Andrew, her oldest, is now a daddy to a baby girl. Elijah is a teenager, high school age. So Betty and Sam would be enjoying having a great granddaughter, as well as seeing their four grandchildren grow up, if they were still with us. We lost them much too soon. Sam was only 55 and Betty was only 67 when they died.

My sister Donna has more great grandchildren than I can remember. She may have only had two children, but they went forth and multiplied as was mentioned in Genesis. Debra and her husband have two children. Their son Shawn has two children. They all need prayer as there is division among them. Shawn has not been in touch with them as he should be in quite sometime, so Debra and Pete have not been able to see Shawn's girls since the first one was a baby. Debra and Pete have a teenager, Natasha, fourteen years and one day younger than Shawn. Remember that Arthur and Debra were one year and one day apart.

Donna's son Arthur has children and grandchildren. He has been missing since 1994 so he has not seen any of his family in a long time. He probably met up with disaster those many years ago. Arthur has three children and many grandchildren. His son David has four or five children plus a stepchild. David lives in Missouri with his family. Arthur's daughter Nicole lives in Wales and just had a baby boy in September. His son Michael lives near Donna and Fred and is a young man now. I wanted to say he is a teenager but time flies by.

Arthur was the cousin my boys had adventures with when they were young. Bike adventures and even a motorcycle adventure are included on the list of things they did together. Arthur was there when Griff had his bicycle accident on suicide hill. Years later Bill and Griff were trailing Arthur when he flew off his motorcycle. They came around a mountain curve and there was Arthur's cycle with the wheels spinning and no Arthur. He had flown off and was nearby. He survived with serious scrapes and bruises. He probably hurt a lot, but xrays showed no broken bones.

Debra has had health problems since she was a child. She has seizures that her medications don't seem to help. Right now she is in the hospital since one of the medications was making her very sick. She had been throwing up a lot and she was told her pancreas was the problem. It turns out to be that the medication is the problem. I don't know if they still think her pancreas is also involved. She has had one thing after another to deal with almost all of her life. When she was sixteen she had a tumor on her spine. That was resolved with surgery and radiation. Thankfully there was no malignancy involved. This all plays havoc with her emotionally. My prayers go out for this special niece.

My other niece also deals with health problems and I pray for her to enjoy improved health soon. She is enjoying life with her "new" husband Jack, a pastor of a little church in Missouri. She also stays interested in Jack's family which includes his adult children and many grandchildren. Elizabeth became like a daughter to me when she was at our house for five years. I have not seen her or her brothers since I was in Billings for their mother's burial in April of 2008.

I was going to write about our niece and nephews on Paul's side of the family, but I will save them for another day. Paul has one brother and he has three children, plus grandchildren. Charlie's three are all younger than our four. His first was born five months after our youngest son. Eric, Carrie and Deron were all born when the family lived in Coronado so we knew them as babies. They moved to Sacramento and our contacts were few so our children did not get to really know each other, I'm sorry to say. It was always a pleasure to see the whole family. We have had some opportunities to get together with them over the years of which I'm thankful for. Paul and I do stay in touch with Paul's brother and his sweet wife Edye. They are the best at writing to us of all of our family.

Families are close to our hearts and always in our prayers. May God bless each of these dear people. We may sometimes have different ideas about life and our creator. We may have different thoughts on politics and other matters. But we come from the same grandparents and have the same aunts and uncles. Most of us have blue eyes, but there may be some with brown eyes. Some are blondes and some brunette. But we have the same blood line. We have bonds that hold us close even when the distance is great. I love my family. I love my nephews and nieces.

Donna married Fred Guapo in 1979 after some years of being a single mother. Her children were grown up by then, but Fred had a young son, Freddy. He is now a fine young man and has a beautiful wife. In 1980 Freddy was with our large family gathering in a family picture that included all of Mom's family. Donna, Betty and myself with all of our children, my husband Paul and Donna's husband Fred were all in this portrait. All were there except Betty's husband Sam. He was still in Montana as he couldn't make that trip to San Diego.

Family reunions are most enjoyable. Getting together with my grown children and grandchildren is extra special for me. My four are spread across the country from California to Florida. Our oldest daughter Kathy, her husband John and their family are in Colorado. Our granddaughters are all grown up. Becky is married and has a baby boy. Melissa is a teacher's aide for a preschool class and she is studying to be a preschool teacher. Our sons each served in the military for a period of time, and they each own their homes, one in California and the other in Florida. Laura shares our home with us. It is a challenge to get everyone together. We can manage to have three together, but that seems to be the most at one time.

Then when it comes to the nephews and nieces it would be a rare treat to gather everyone together again. The last time may have been when we had that large family portrait in 1980. We also had a very nice gathering with four generations at Kathy and John's wedding in 1983. But there is always someone missing in the picture. We have several more favorite family pictures when our granddaughters were little. These were three and four generation portraits with all four of our children present. It is fun to think on these things. I do not expect all of my mother's grandchildren to gather together again in my lifetime, but the memories are sweet.

originally written October 18,2011
first picture-Arthur and Debra
second pic.-Gary,Elizabeth &Bill in front
Laura and Kathy holding Griff in back
third pic.-my Dad with all of his grandchildren
fourth picture-Arthur with kitten
fifth pic.-Arthur, Laura and Kathy with kittens
last picture is our large family portrait with Mom
and all of Mom's family as described in story.

A Family Car

The blue Plymouth station wagon had served Paul's parents well and they were getting a new Jeep Wagoneer. The Plymouth still had miles left on it so Paul's dad gave it to us. We had not yet owned a car so this was a real blessing to our young family. We had four children and it was nice to finally have our own set of wheels. We lived in Coronado and could walk everywhere in our small town. Paul's dad, aka Pop, helped us by taking us to the grocery store when needed. We sometimes had other rides with him too so we had managed without a car. We also knew how to use public transportation when necessary.

This is the car that I had ridden in to go to the hospital to have at least two of our babies. I already wrote about the middle of the night ride to the hospital with Pop to deliver our youngest baby at Mercy Hospital in San Diego. Paul's parents also took me to the hospital in Coronado to have my first baby. The blue Plymouth was their vehicle then.

They purchased the Plymouth while Paul and I were dating in 1954, unless it was late 1953 as we were beginning our courtship then. It was a 53 model car. It is the car Paul's brother drove to take us to San Diego the day we were married at the Methodist Church in Coronado in August of 1954. San Diego was our destination since that is where we had our honeymoon. Paul had to work that week at the civic center in San Diego and we made the most of the situation. We stayed in a motel across the street from where Paul worked at the time.

This little blue station wagon was also the vehicle that I rode in with Paul's parents when they took me to Fort Ord to meet Paul after his Army basic training in 1955. We had an enjoyable trip going north on the coast highway towards Monterey, California and then to Fort Ord. Paul was ready for some leave time and I was so happy to see my new husband. I was expecting our first child that same summer and this would be the last time we spent together before she was born. Paul was able to come south with us back to Coronado and spend some precious time with me.

The next summer when Paul was in Korea his parents took baby Kathy and me on a vacation to see my grandma and other relatives in Washington state. The Plymouth was the vehicle we rode in on that memorable vacation. That was the only time I got to see Grandma after I was married and a mother. So Grandma got to see little Kathy, but never got to see my other babies. Kathy had her first birthday on that vacation. Paul's father had the car packed with the crib on top and the mattress to the crib in the back seat for Kathy to sleep and play on as we traveled. No child seats or seat belts in those days. I rode in the front with Mom and Pop. The luggage fit nicely in the back of the car.

That little blue station wagon transported family members for years. Paul's parents went on at least one or two other vacations in that car. One trip they took with just the two of them was to see family in Michigan soon after Paul and I got married. They did not get as many opportunities to travel as they would have liked. But they did enjoy life. They enjoyed square dancing together for a number of years.

I think it was 1965 when Paul's parents gave us the Plymouth. I know we had it when we moved to Olive Lane from the two hundred block of F Avenue. It was with us helping us move everything to the other end of Coronado, from near the bay to a block or two from the ocean. Our station wagon took us to church and Sunday school each week as well as trips to the grocery store. Old Blue was used to these trips as she had been used for transporting us over the years when the senior Marvins had her.

One time soon after we moved to Olive Lane we decided it was high time that we go to the mountains in our "new" vehicle. We had not been able to do this without a car of our own. It had been years since we had made this trip to our mountains. They are not very far away, but they may as well be in another state with no way to get there. We packed a picnic and all four children into our car and headed east to our destination. It had been so long since we had been that way. This is when the freeway over the mountain was partly built. I was used to the old highway so it was not all familiar to me. Paul was not used to driving freeways yet either. We had an adventure ahead of us.

We managed to get just to the other side of Alpine when we had car problems. It was overheating so we could not continue east to Cuyamaca or Julian. We were just beginning the mountain road east of Alpine and had to turn back to find another place to picnic. We were blessed to find a park in Alpine that fit our need. This was Dinosaur Park which was a very interesting place to discover. It had probably seen better days but that did not matter to us. We never found it again and it isn't even there anymore. So glad we enjoyed this little bit if local history.

Paul soon learned to drive freeways and get around San Diego with me navigating. We didn't go a lot of places though as we mainly stayed in Coronado. It was nice to have the car available when we needed it. We eventually got another used car and gave our blue Plymouth to a teenager we knew. I don't remember what year that would have been. Our old car was used by a class in high school to learn auto mechanics if my memory serves me well.

In 1972 Paul's Dad was getting another car so he gave us the Jeep Wagoneer that he had used for so many years. The Jeep had seen some good days with the family as well as some sad days. Our children had enjoyed rides with their grandparents in the Jeep. The senior Marvins enjoyed many happy moments together in their blue Wagoneer. Paul's mother had her final rides in this car not long before she died after her long battle with breast cancer. She died on her sixtieth birthday in December of 1971. She had been the hostess at many a family gathering. We would miss her delicious meals and the filled cookie jars. She was the grandmother that never forgot a birthday. I'm sure she would have liked seeing us enjoy our "new" Jeep Wagoneer. It may have been a 1965 model but it was new to us.

In 1973 we bought our home in San Diego, south of Chula Vista, east of Imperial Beach. This is the south part of San Diego somewhat removed from most of San Diego. We sure appreciated having Jake the Jeep to help us move this time. We traveled out of Coronado for this move. Our first time living someplace besides Coronado. My mother was just one mile from where our new place was. She was happy to have us nearby. Our blue Jeep saw us through many adventures. We finally had those mountain trips we so longed for. I learned the map by heart to get us places.

Jake the Jeep was a few cars ago, but we are still in the house we moved to in 1973. We bought several cars that we got a lot of mileage from and then Paul's Dad gave us one more car after he stopped driving. The last one we got from him was a Nissan Sentra. It was a nice little car that we enjoyed for a few years. We bought one more car that we used for a short time. We now use public transportation and enjoy the kindness of others when they offer us rides. Our car history is not really very long, but we have enjoyed going a lot of places along the way. We have collected memories from all the western states and many National Parks. We have enjoyed living close to beaches. And it is not really so far to the mountains and desert. San Diego county has it all. We can do three separate terrains in one day. But we do need a car to do this.

Thankfully we have family and friends to continue our adventures with. When Bill is here from Florida we go more places than we did when we had our car. So the adventures continue.

Our Old Dodge

When I was nine or ten years old, soon after we came back to Coronado after WWII, my parents were blessed to receive a 1938 Dodge from my grandfather. It was a black beauty that had the misfortune of being crashed into as it was parked next to my grandparent's house in the middle of the night. Third street did not have much traffic in those days, especially in the wee hours of the night, so this was big news in our neighborhood.

In the morning when I got up I heard about all the commotion that had gone on while I was sleeping. Granddad's car had been hit by a young man as he drove down the street next to our family home on third street. The old Dodge now needed repair and a new paint job. Since Granddad did not do much driving anymore he decided to give the car to my parents as they needed it. They had not had a car during the war and were so glad to accept our grandfather's generosity. Since the car needed to be painted they chose to have it painted green. It was more common for cars to be black in those days so our car stood out with the new paint job and the rack they had installed on top of the car.

Mom and Dad began painting houses together around this period of time. Originally Dad was the main painter, but it was not long before they were a team. Mom did the driving as Dad did not see good enough to drive anymore. Dad used to drive for a living when Mom and Dad first knew each other, but things had changed over the years. Now Mom was at the wheel and Dad navigated. He was good at this. He was a very good painter and soon had Mom doing detail work. The car with the rack on top gave them a way to carry paint supplies and ladders to their jobs.

There was plenty of room in the old Dodge for my two sisters and me when we needed to go someplace in the car. I mainly remember walking most places I went since we were mostly in Coronado at this time. I do remember going down the Silver Strand on occasion with my parents. The Strand was just one lane each way in those days. It was widened later in the fifties. I remember going to Imperial Beach where Mom and Dad were painting some houses that were being built then. They also painted one or two houses for the same contractor out near Spring Valley or Lemon Grove. They mostly painted in Coronado for different homeowners.

In the spring of 1949 we decided to travel to Washington state in our old green Dodge. My sister Donna had been there since the previous summer so it was just Betty and me in the back seat along with our pets and many belongings. Mom and Dad were in the front seat along with a friend of the family. I guess this way Mom had someone else who could help drive. Dad was still the navigator. The trunk was full and the rack on top had a large wardrobe with things packed inside. The pets Betty and I were sharing space with were my little turtle, Mac, and our little red hen, Susie Q. Yes, we shared space with a chicken. We had her in a crate for her own safety. This is probably my most told story, with variations each time. I should have a picture for posterity.

I may forget other old cars Mom and Dad probably had after this, but how can I forget our old green Dodge? There are other memories associated with it too. I remember our family going to Tijuana in the car. I remember that one time we went to the horse races south of the border in our Dodge. That is the only time I ever went to the races. I was still a child then.

We sometimes visited my Aunt Clara and her family at their home in Spring Valley. It was still country then. There was a little stream that went along their road that I remember playing in. There was a large California pepper tree in the yard next to the old two story house. I remember climbing this tree as a child. In 1950 we stayed in my aunt's house for a quarter of the school year after we came back from Washington. Some of my cousins were with us then. Mom and Dad had to commute to Coronado from the house in the country so they could continue painting houses in the city. It was a long ways to go in their old green Dodge each day. I took a school bus to school in La Mesa. My sisters went to a nearby school in Spring Valley.

In Washington we also went to the country school by bus. We lived on our grandparents farm then. Mom and Dad helped my mother's parents with their farm at that time. Dad came back to California earlier to find a place for us to live. That is when he made arrangements with his sister for us to live in her Spring Valley house.

Dad's brother came to Washington after Christmas to help us move back to California. This was 1949, just before a new decade. I had just turned thirteen. The reason my uncle came to help us is because his two children were with us then. They had been on the farm with us since summer. They got lessons in a completely different lifestyle than they were used to. They were city kids with no farm experience. I mean old fashioned farm, including outhouse. We left Susie Q on the farm. I hope she survived the blizzard that hit a day or so after we left. We were back in our old Dodge with more kids than before and I still had my turtle. We added a kitten to the mix. We were pulling a small trailer for our belongings on this trip. There was Mom and Uncle Elliot with at least one child in the front seat. No seat belts in those days. The children and teenagers in the car were my two cousins Malcolm and Geraldine plus my two sisters and me. A full car.

So our old car that Granddad gave us after the war was part of our family history. These stories are a significant part of my growing up years and I never get tired of telling them. If it weren't for the time my cousins were with us on the farm and in Spring Valley I would only have childhood pictures to know them by. I barely saw them any other time in my life. When I was very young there are pictures of us on the porch of our grandparents home on third and F in Coronado. These are cute pictures of us playing with Grandma's pots and pans. And since I am back to the place this story began I guess it is a good place to close.

Mom and Dad's New Beauty

It was pink and it was pretty. It was the first new car Mom and Dad ever had and the year was 1960. It was a beauty, long and sleek. Mom was at the wheel and Dad was the navigator of their brand new Mercury. They had only owned older vehicles in the past and they had served them well. It was time for them to own this beauty. It would be their home away from home as they spent their days painting other people's houses. There was plenty of room in the trunk for all their painting equipment, except for the ladders. I don't remember how they managed the ladders with this car. I know they had a rack on top of at least one of their older vehicles, the main car I remember from the past.

This new automobile would be the one that would bring me and our new baby boy home from the hospital in November of 1960. Since Paul and I did not yet own a car my parents brought me home from the hospital with at least three of our babies. Laura, Bill and Griff were all born at Mercy Hospital in San Diego. I remember that Mom and Dad are the ones who brought us home from the hospital since it became a tradition to stop at my father's cousin's house to show off the babies on the way home. Ethel and her husband lived on Fifth Avenue just south of Mercy hospital so it was a nice opportunity. I'm sure that in 1960 my parents would have also enjoyed showing off their new car too. Two years later in December, right after Christmas, our second baby boy would have this ride in the Mercury. This was baby number four and the last time we made this same trip home from Mercy Hospital.

Eventually Mom bought another new Mercury, but I don't remember if it was while Dad was still with us or a while later. This second Mercury is the one my children remember best. It was more of a gold color car. Mom and Dad put a lot of wear and tear on their vehicles as they did a lot of painting and that is hard on cars. The cars appeared well lived in within a short time.

Mom and Dad also bought their first new home in the early sixties. I remember spending Christmas of 1962 at their new house with Paul and our three children. I was great with child and would go to the hospital early the next day to give birth to our youngest child. Actually Paul's father took me to the hospital sometime after I had our children snug in their beds for the night. I had a nice Christmas with family and timed it so that Griff was born the morning of the 26th. How is that for good timing? This was the only time I had to go to the hospital in the middle of the night with any of the children.

I can remember going on the ferry from Coronado to San Diego in the middle of the night when the boats did not run as often. This was way before the bridge was built. When Paul's Dad and I were on the ferry I said to him that I hoped that I was in labor. He told me that I better be. He and I had a good relationship so I was not too concerned about this comment. I think it is sort of humorous. Thankfully I never had false labor with any of the babies.

My Dad did not get to enjoy their home very long before he got cancer. All he knew was that he was in pain and never got treated properly for cancer until it was too late. He died in November of 1964. He worked hard until the very end. I'm glad that my parents were able to enjoy their beautiful Mercury before Dad got sick. I'm thankful that they bought their first home while Dad was able to do so. We enjoyed several family gatherings in their new home with my sisters and their families as well as my family while Dad was with us.

Mom lived in this home in the area where we now live in the south part of San Diego until her final days in 1996. She was happy when we bought our house just a mile from her in 1973. Eventually our house would be where most family gatherings took place. As with her home ours is beginning to get old after so many years of sheltering our family. The homes and vehicles of our lives need upkeep and they show signs of age after a while. But the memories we have with them are wonderful.

Mom and Dad were able to take at least one good trip in their beautiful Mercury in 1961. Mom and Dad traveled that one time with my sister Donna and her husband and children to Washington to see family. That would be Donna's only chance to see our grandmother in Washington since we were children. They also got to see Mom's brother Ray and his family on their farm at that time.

Mom would have more chances to travel in her later years with her second husband Frank. They enjoyed many vacations together in their vehicles. They enjoyed visiting her brother's family in Washington and my sister Betty's family in Montana, as well as Frank's brother in Florida. Many stories could be written about their adventures together. Mom may have had other new vehicles over the years, but none can compare to that beautiful pink Mercury in 1960.

October Festivities

It has been almost a year since I wrote my first blog post on Halloween of 2010. I shared some things about Halloween in the first couple of blog posts I wrote. My husband's birthday is near Halloween on October 26th. This year he will be 78 years old on his birthday. When we were kids that was considered old. We may look like seniors, but we still think like younger folk. We may have more wisdom than we did a number of years ago, but it is still hard for us to see ourselves as elderly. When the newspaper writes about someone in their sixties they refer to them as elderly so that must really mean we are old. Then when we walk down the street I can tell that we are not as young as we used to be as we have slowed down significantly.

My father did not have the chance to get to be a senior. Dad was only 53 years old when he died from kidney cancer. He was a hard worker all of his life, until the very end. Mom and Dad painted houses together for many years. They started painting together after World War II and continued into the sixties. Mom was still painting even after Dad died. Dad was born in Washington DC on October 16, 1911 and died in November of 1964 in Chula Vista, California. He was the ninth child in a family of nine children. He was the seventh son and was twenty years younger than his oldest brother. He was the only one born in a hospital of all nine children. He became an uncle at the young age of one year old when his sister had her first child.

Dad told about the time he was playing in Rock Creek Park in Washington DC and saw President Wilson go past where he was playing. That is how I can remember who was president when Dad was a child in Washington. Dad and part of his family moved to California when he was nine years old. Granddad came to San Diego to work at North Island where he was until he retired. They moved to the house on Third and F in Coronado soon after they came to San Diego. This is the house that I consider the family home as my grandparents were there the rest of their lives. After Grandma died in 1960 the family sold the house and there have been several owners, but I still call it Grandma's house. My Grandfather died early in the 1950s. He would have been in his seventies.

I did not meet all of my father's siblings as not all of them came to California. Many were adults when the family headed west. Some visited in Coronado over the years, but at least one never came so Dad never saw him again after he was nine years old. I knew most of his brothers and one sister though. I also did not know all of my cousins. My sisters and I were the youngest set of cousins of my dad's family. There were one or two cousins Donna's age, but I doubt any as young as my youngest sister Betty. We had cousins almost as old as Dad that we did not ever see or communicate with.

If I remember the story correctly some of Dad's siblings were actually born in the west, but they moved east before my dad was born. So some of the ones who were born in the west ended up staying in the east most of their lives. And Dad who was born in the east ended up living in the west most of his life. I have a niece who knows all the details, much more than I know. She even corrected me on one cousin's name. I always thought grandma called him Luke. I don't really know what his real name is. And my niece said we spell Grandma's maiden name wrong. At least she knows the correct way to spell it.

The reason I wanted to talk about my father, R. Eugene McDonaugh, aka Gene, is because he would be one hundred years old if he were still with us. A century is quite a landmark event in history. I miss my father even more today than I did when he was first gone. The pastor we had when Daddy died visited him in the hospital along with Paul and a friend of ours. Dad was in very bad condition but they said he accepted the Lord. I hope Dad knew what was going on enough to really have accepted Jesus as his Savior. I want to believe that I will see him again someday.

Daddy was young at heart and he looked young too. It seems to be a family trait. He has been gone almost half a century and I can see him clearly in my minds eye. I wish that he had been here longer so my children would have a much clearer memory of him. My boys were too young to remember, but the girls may remember some things. Daddy was the same age as Laura is now when he died. So young.

My sister Donna will celebrate her birthday on October 18th, two days after we remember Dad's birthday. She is younger than me, yet she has passed the seventy milestone. Donna is certainly young at heart. She has always looked younger than she is. That can be a blessing when we are older. When she was younger it was sometimes an inconvenience. Another family trait is that she is a hard worker like Mom and Dad. She was the one that pushed buttons and made Betty and me keep on keeping on when work needed to be done when we were kids. I may have been the mother hen, but Donna was often at the top of the pecking order even though she was the middle child.

Donna has not had an easy time as she had to divorce her first husband and was a single mother for a number of years. Arthur and Debra kept her challenged. Donna kept the home in order and worked very hard at a fabric store too. She also did a lot of sewing for people as well as for herself. It was a blessing when after a number of years she met and married Fred Guapo. Fred had a young son who has since grown to be a fine young man. Donna's son Arthur has been missing since 1994 and we know that something happened to him for him to not be seen all these many years. As soon as he went missing we feared the worst. Nothing has changed since then. It must be hard for Donna to have a missing son. It breaks my heart as his aunt. My prayer is for us to someday find out what happened to Arthur. May we be able to see Arthur and all of our loved ones someday in heaven. Then we can really celebrate.

We have more October birthdays to celebrate. My nephew Matthew Hamilton has an October birthday. He enjoys Halloween so I try to find a cute Halloween card for his birthday. Matthew dresses with quite a flair. He likes to wear black and that is his signature in his attire. Nothing sloppy about him as he puts together his wardrobe. He likes to have a hand in the life of his nephew and niece too. Matthew and at least one of his brothers live in their family home in Billings. Both of their parents are no longer with us. Betty and Sam died much too soon. Thankfully they left a nice home for their kids.

I have several friends with October birthdays. I won't even try to list them as I would feel bad if I left out one of my friends. At least one of my friends does not like having her birthday so close to Halloween. It is a dark day to celebrate. I just remember the fun times we had as children on Halloween. And then when my children were young we enjoyed making up costumes and going trick or treating. But I can understand why someone would not like that day. We do not want to celebrate the bad spirits, ghosts and goblins and witches.

We need to celebrate life. Jesus died to give us life and we need to celebrate the life we have in Him. Darkness and light cannot coexist. Jesus is the light of the world.

So in October we can remember the loved ones whose birthdays we celebrate. We can remember the ones who have gone on before us. This is the time of year we think of autumn leaves and all the pretty colors of fall. Pumpkins and apples and other seasonal fruit remind us of God's many blessings.

family portrait is of Gene and Ida McDonaugh
and their daughters Caroline, Donna and Betty
the day Donna graduated from eighth grade
in Coronado.
The next photo is Donna's senior picture- 1956

Trust in the Lord With All Your Heart

As I write I try to keep a positive tone to my words. It has not always been this way. I went through a long dry spell where I could not see the light at the end of the tunnel. This was many years ago and even though I have had struggles in more recent years I try to look at the positive side of life. We are truly blessed with knowing that God loves us and has provided the way for us to enjoy eternity with Him.

If I did not have the Lord in my life at this time I would be wallowing in a self pity party. There are so many things that can overwhelm the soul. As we get older our bodies are wearing out and we need a strong resolve to not give up. At the same time those we love are going through struggles of their own and may need our encouragement. I try to be the one who says the word of encouragement to my loved ones. In the past there were many who helped me along the way.

I had family there for me when my children were young and I needed an extra hand. I don't know how to say this without seeming to be negative about my husband, but I was basically the mother and father to our children. Paul faithfully held a steady job and he was always faithful to me. But I had a very difficult time and went into serious depression for a number of years. Paul did not know how to be the daddy that our children needed. If I said anything he would just say that he didn't do anything. Meaning he did not do anything wrong as far as he could see. I even tried to get help with this situation but had no success.

I did not intend to write about this at this time. I have put my thoughts on paper many times and torn up half of what I put on paper. I am mostly past those hurtful days but they sometimes come back to haunt me. When I see happy families I am jealous and that is not good. I love my husband and my children a lot and want the best for all of them. Thankfully my husband loves the Lord and we share the same values in most ways.

The main thing I wanted to write is about my dear daughter that is going through her own very difficult time. I am able to be most sympathetic and understanding on one hand. But on the other hand I miss having her available to talk to and really be able to communicate with her. She has always been close to me and we can share so much with each other. Problem is I depend on her and she is not well enough to be able to give that much of herself at this time. I am here for her, but mostly I can pray for her. I pray for the Lord to put His healing hand upon her and to put His loving arms around her. Thankfully she loves the Lord and puts her trust in Him.

Not only is my body wearing out, our house is showing it's age and needs a lot of loving care. Over the years we have done our best to do what is needed for the house, but things are multiplying and I need to be a better manager of time and talent. Thankfully Paul keeps the books. But so many things are on my list and not his list. We have sons who do what they can when they are able to be here. I often have a 'honey do list' for at least one of our sons when possible. Actually they each have their own ways of doing for us which are more interesting than what I ask them to do. One son fills our cupboard and refrigerator several times a year. The other son takes us on excursions when he is in town. They are appreciated. They are in my prayers each day.

I need to go to Colorado to see our other daughter and her family. I haven't even seen our great grandson yet. I am missing out on precious moments in time and I can only blame myself. I need to go get my identification updated so I can fly. I will figure out the funds when that time comes. Families are precious and I miss those days when we had our granddaughters here with us. I loved having them nearby when they were little. Thankfully they stay in touch with me on Facebook. I am so glad that they know the Lord.

By trusting in the Lord I get my mind off myself and think on things of greater importance. I can forgive the things which have been negatives in my life. I remember my dear sisters in Christ that were there for me when I was so needy. So many precious moments that I must not forget. How can I testify if I can't share the sad moments that make the happier moments so much more meaningful? Yet there are some things that are buried in the depths of the sea as the old chorus goes.

"Down in the depths of the deep blue sea lie all the sins once charged to me. Buried for time and eternity, down in the deep blue sea."   This is how I remember this old song we sang when I first knew the Lord.

September Songs

There is something about September. It was always the beginning of the school year with signs of autumn in the air. We may not have obvious seasons in San Diego but there are small changes that we can be sensitive to. There are trees that change color to remind us of the season that is upon us. The colors are lovely and remind us of the beauty of God's creation.

I am reminded of my grandmother whose birthday was on September 6th. I do not remember the year of her birth, but she was in her eighties when she went to be with the Lord sometime in the sixties. Pearl Elizabeth Davenport, my mother's mother, lived on a farm and took my sisters and me under her wings for a few years when we were little. Grandma and Grandad loved the Lord and each other. They were both loved by family and many friends. Grandma lost her dear husband in the early fifties. We had last seen them right after Christmas in 1949 when I had just turned thirteen years old. Kathy and I got to see Grandma in 1956 when Kathy was one year old. So Grandma saw one of my babies.

On September 6, 1997 we have another time to remember. We were shocked when my brother-in-law Sam Hamilton died suddenly of a heart attack and left my sister a widow on this day in September. Sam was only fifty-five years old. Betty and Sam's children were even more shocked than I was when they lost their Dad. This was also a day the world was remembering Princess Diana as it was the day of her funeral.

My mother's birthday was September 16th. She was a farm girl from Washington state. She came to California as a young lady soon after she graduated from 'normal school', aka teacher's college, a two year school. She had relatives who were teachers so I guess she had been encouraged to consider teaching. In California she accepted the jobs available to her. She was always a hard worker and took a job as a housekeeper. She soon met Gene McDonaugh and they became serious and got married in 1935. They had three daughters of which I am the oldest.

Mom became a widow in 1964 when Dad was only fifty-three years old. She continued housepainting as she had done for many years with Dad. She eventually married her second husband and they enjoyed traveling to see family each year. Mom also helped Frank with selling produce from his truck for a number of years. They knew famous people that they sold produce to, including Desi Arnez. Mom became a widow again when she was eighty years old in 1993. Mom lived until May of 1996, on Mothers Day weekend. Over the years Mom had been everything from a wife and mother to 'Rosie the Riveter', as well as house painting with Dad and selling produce and driving the truck for Frank.

We have other September birthdays in our family including my brother-in-law Fred Guapo. My sister Donna's husband, Fred, will celebrate his 66th birthday on the 24th. It is my pleasure to have Fred as part of our family. Fred is another hard worker and is focused on selling properties in the Los Angeles area. I think he can drive L.A. in his sleep as he not only drives the freeways every day, he grew up in Los Angeles. He is also the father of one son, Freddy.

Donna became a mother September 29, 1957 when her son Arthur Louis Sinclair was born. At that time I became an aunt. A year and a day later Debra Marie Sinclair was born making Arthur be a big brother. Laura fits right in the middle of Arthur and Debbie. She was born in March of 1958. Arthur and Debra and my children were close as cousins can be and spent much time together during the earlier years. Seems like Arthur was often involved in my sons' adventures.

We remember Arthur all through the year especially in the month of his birthday and again in January. He has been missing since January 20th of 1994 when he was last seen. His mother and sister especially miss him. He has children that did not get to know him and are missing a father in their lives. He has a wife who helped Donna report him as missing in 1994. He has a father that I'm sure misses him. He had grandmothers that missed him when he first disappeared. I miss my nephew and I'm sure my children miss their cousin. I'm sure other cousins miss Arthur too.

Arthur and Debra fought and loved each other as siblings do. Even as they fought I'm sure they were the best of friends. They were so close in age that Donna actually had two babies at the same time. One year and a day apart, they were almost like twins. September babies.

Another September baby in our family was our first granddaughter, Rebecca Jean Golden. Kathy and John got married September 3, 1983 and just celebrated their twenty-eighth anniversary. Kathy was twenty-eight when they got married. So she has been married half of her life. On September 27, 1984 Kathy and John welcomed their first daughter, Rebecca. We call her Becky. She will celebrate her twenty-seventh birthday this month. Becky has a big brother Michael and a sister Melissa. Kathy is the step mother of Michael. He was seven years old when his dad married Kathy.

Becky is now married to Jason Van Maanen. We call him Jay. They are the parents of baby Jacob who was born in December.

In September we think of trips to the mountains to see the fall colors. We may have to save our trips to the mountains for October when our son Bill will be here. We enjoy the calls and songs of birds when we are with our son. We also enjoy their colors as they blend into the scenery around them.

September songs can be birthday songs or back to school songs. We have had wedding songs in September also.  We have more friends and family with September celebrations to remember. I send some birthday greetings by mail and some by computer. And if I call to give my greetings I may even get brave and sing a song.

Thoughts on August

On August 15, 1954 Paul and I said our marriage vows in the old Methodist Church in Coronado, California. This was my parents' nineteenth wedding anniversary. After this I would never forget their anniversary and they would not forget mine. Paul and I were teenage sweethearts looking forward to our years together. We had a sweet wedding with many friends and family present on a lovely Sunday afternoon.

A year later on August 28th our first baby daughter was born at the Coronado Hospital. Kathleen Jean Marvin weighed eight pounds plus one and a half ounces. She shared my middle name Jean. My dad was known as Gene so my name was partly from him. Kathy was born on a Sunday which is my favorite day of the week.

Paul was in the Army at Fort Ord and not able to get away to see his new baby girl for another week. He had a weekend leave and barely had time to visit us for a day or two before he had to head back to his training at the base. Kathy was a week old when he saw her. Then again when she was six weeks old he was able to get to Coronado again to see us. Back to Fort Ord and more training. After this Paul spent eight weeks in Colorado in a tent in the snow getting ready to go to Korea where he spent sixteen months. Thankfully this was after the war. But it was not easy for us to be apart for almost all of his time in the Army. As it was, Paul only saw his new little daughter those two times during her first year and a half. Not a good way to start a new family.

Since these are my thoughts on August I will get back to my theme. Kathy spent her first birthday with her Grandma and Granddad Marvin and me on the trip we took that summer. We had gone to Washington state to see my grandma and other Davenports there. We were on the way home from Washington on little Kathy's first birthday. Yes, Paul's parents took me on this trip to see my grandmother. They were going to Canada so decided to take Kathy and me to Washington. They were always good to me and were great with their grandchildren.

On Kathy's second birthday I was in the hospital after having surgery. Kathy spent her birthday and many other days with her Grandma and Granddad Marvin. I'm sure my parents and sister Betty would have spent some of that time with Kathy. She was the darling of the family. My parents loved being grandparents as much as Paul's parents did. My sisters loved their role as aunts.

By this time my sister Donna was married and living in Los Angeles with her new husband. They were expecting their first baby by this time. Their baby was expected in September. I was expecting our second baby and she would be born in March of 1958.

We now celebrate another August birthday as our granddaughter Melissa Joy Golden was born August 16, 1988. She joined big sister Rebecca Jean Golden who was born four years earlier in September of 1984. Missy was born on Whidbey Island in Washington state and Becky was born in the Navy Hospital in San Diego. Their Daddy John Golden was in the Navy at the time.

It has been a blessing to be a grandmother and I have enjoyed spending time with Kathy and John's girls over the years. The girls are grown up now and Becky is a Mommy to Jacob who was born in December of 2010. They all live in Colorado.

My sister Donna became a grandmother six years before I did. Her first grandson, David, was born August 6th, probably in 1978. My sister Betty's first grandchild was also born on August 6th. Brittany is twenty one this year so she would have been born in 1990.

We have had other August weddings and birthdays over the years. Becky and Jay were married August 8th last year so they recently celebrated their first wedding anniversary. They had a sweet backyard wedding with their close friends and family. I'm sorry to have missed their special day. But Laura and I were at the restaurant with the family when they announced their engagement. Becky and Jay also came to San Diego for their honeymoon so we got to see the newlyweds.

So in August we have many birthdays to celebrate as well as wedding anniversaries to remember. There may not be any holidays in August, but we can celebrate life and love. The next month we also have many loved ones to remember. We are certainly blessed.

top photo- Caroline and Paul
next photo- Paul
last picture- Becky and baby Jacob

More Coronado Memories

No sooner was I finished with my last blog post about Coronado than I thought of more things to share. I know I can get redundant, repeating myself, but I also don't want to forget anything.

Yesterday Laura and I were walking down an alley in Coronado which made me remember several things. I remember when not all of the alleys were paved. It took a long time for all the alleys in Coronado to be paved. Laura even remembers that some were not paved when she was young. I assume they are all paved now. Many communities still have unpaved alleyways. We don't even have alleys in the area we live in.

Our last place of residence in Coronado was on Olive Lane, an alley. It is an interesting alley, shaped like a T, with little cottages facing the alley. There are other interesting alleys especially named such as Adella Lane. Paul and his family lived on Adella Lane in the little house they built before they built their larger home in front, on Pomona Avenue. They lived on Pomona Avenue when I met and married Paul. That is the house that our children remember.

Another memory that was triggered while walking in the alley is a faint one from my childhood. I know it is true because the subject came up a couple of years ago while visiting Paul's brother Charlie and cousin George. The conversation starts with, "Do you remember the alligator in Coronado?" I guess this was a conversation starter during several gatherings that year. Yes, I do remember the alligator. As children several of us looked over the tall fence in an alley to get a good look. It had a nice pond and was securely enclosed in the yard. I wonder how many years it was there.

When my children were young the talk of the town and in the Coronado Journal was the cougar. One family had a real live cougar. I think one of our children knew someone from that family. She may have been in Bill or Griff's class. Paul wrote about the cougar in one of his many letters to the editor. I still run into articles about the Coronado cougar.

When I was young our family raised chickens in Coronado. I remember having an incubator to keep the young chicks warm. They grew fast and my parents sold them as fryers. Yes, Dad had to butcher them. He was not a farm boy, but he learned to do this. My mother was a farm girl and knew how to clean them so they could be eaten. Some grew to be hens and provided eggs. One was our pet and we were attached to her. She is the subject of one of my favorite stories.

When Donna was ten years old she was the first one in our family to fly in an airplane. She flew to Washington state to spend the year with our grandparents on their farm. She went to help them with their chores. I'm sure it was more beneficial to my sister as she received many valuable lessons from our grandparents. There were eggs to gather and lessons learned in the kitchen as well as the barn. There were also Bible lessons to learn.

I mention this story as it leads to the chicken story. In the spring of 1949 Mom, Dad, Betty and I decided to move out of our grandparents' home on Third and F in Coronado and head to the farm in Washington. This meant finding homes for several pets. We decided to take Susie Q, our pet hen, with us on the trip. I also had Mac, my turtle, along for the ride. Our car was loaded with all our worldly goods as well as our family and pets. We had things piled on top of the car and in the large trunk. Betty and I shared the back seat with Susie Q and Mac. Susie was in a suitable box and safe for the journey. She laid two eggs on the trip, and we always said one of them was while we were crossing the Golden Gate Bridge. Maybe that was so.

You can picture us being quite the sight for sore eyes. Before heading north we stopped at our dentist's house as he and his wife were friends of ours. Mom and Dad had done a lot of painting for them. His wife said that her cousin's husband was a pastor in Washington. Can you imagine the surprise when we went to church that first Sunday we were in Washington and the cousin's husband was the pastor at the little church that my grandparents always attended. He had even baptized my sister during the time she had been with our grandparents. It is a small world.

Later that year, right after Christmas, we headed back to California. We left Susie Q on the farm, but my turtle came back to California with us. I have written about this eventful year several times so will not go into more detail about all that happened.

Fast forward to the sixties and we meet up with the pastor from my grandparents' church again. Paul and I were going with our children to First Baptist Church in Coronado. In 1966 we had a new pastor and his family at the church. You guessed right. It was the same pastor as I mentioned before. He had been at the Logan Heights church in San Diego for years and was happy for the opportunity to move to Coronado. To this day his wife Betty is one of my good friends. They were not in Coronado long, but lived in San Diego for many years. Four years ago they moved to Texas to be near family as they were getting on in years. Pastor Clark went to be with the Lord several years ago and it is good that Betty is near her family.

Yesterday Laura and I met Betty in Coronado along with another good friend from so many years ago. Betty is visiting friends in San Diego and then is headed to Washington to spend time with family. This was my second opportunity to see Betty since she moved to Texas. So Betty, Carolyn, Laura and I spent time together at the Ferry Landing in Coronado yesterday enjoying getting caught up on family news. We could have talked longer but everyone has a full calendar. These are precious moments in time. Oh, Betty is 90 years old now, or will be in December. She could pass for a much younger lady. Except for Laura I was the youngest of the bunch. I will be 75 in December. Just a kid, ha ha.

Since I mentioned the Ferry Landing I will mention the old ferries. Until the bridge opened in 1969 we had the large car ferries between Coronado and San Diego. They went from the foot of Orange Avenue to where Sea Port Village is now. We could go across in our cars or as pedestrians. It did not cost much and was a break from the trials of the day. Sometimes as pedestrians we would go back and forth without paying any extra. It was a time to feel the breeze from the bay and look for an occasional porpoise near the ferry. The San Diego skyline was different then too.

When Griff was a cub Scout we had an opportunity to go with his fellow scouts and their families on a whale watching trip out of the Coronado Yacht Club. This was the first time that I can remember going out in the ocean. We enjoyed whale sightings and a relaxing time on the water that morning. Since then we have gone on several whale watching day trips. Another fun trip is the Harbor Cruise around the bay. We have done that a number of times. We have taken friends and family over the years. We like the two hour cruise rather than the shorter cruise.

When I was in fifth grade my friend  Georgette and I spent some time hanging around the yacht club and someone gave us a short jaunt on his sailboat. That really caught on with my friend as she continued to be enamored with boating over the years. I remember one summer I spent a very long day with her at the beach and got very sunburned. We all have to learn the hard way to be careful in the sun. Another time, with other friends when I was fifteen, I spent a day sailing in the bay to the cove which is now part of the State Beach. It was another long day in the sun and another bad sunburn.

My children had their bad sunburns too. The sunburns were so bad they maybe needed medical care. They became very cautious after that. Paul has always been cautious since he was a redhead with fair skin. Kathy is very fair too so has always had to be careful. The other three are the ones that got the bad burns that I mentioned. I remember my sister Donna getting a bad burn or two also.

One time when I was thirteen my friend Georgette and I were walking our dogs on the beach and they got tar or some kind of oil on their paws. It was impossible to get off them. We tried alcohol if I remember correctly. It really hurt their poor little paws. That is a not to do ever again experience.

When I was in sixth grade I spent a lot of time at the Coronado stables. Yes, Coronado had stables. They were near Forth Street, near the North Island gate. There are houses there now which are part of the Country Club Estates. There used to be a golf course on that side of town west of Alameda Blvd. As for me spending time at the stables, I never rode any horses there. I liked a boy that was there. I spent a lot of time with Penny that year too. I'm sure she went to the stables with me. This was not long before our family left for Washington in 1949.

That is also the year that I went on a first date to the Village Theater in Coronado. The Village would have just been two years old at that time. Nicky is the young man who took me to the movies that time. I even remember that we saw "The Three Musketeers". Nicky also spent time at the stables. He was not the one that I had my eye on at the stables though. I liked a boy named Paul. But he preferred that I would turn my attention to Nicky. It was all very proper sixth grade situations. Nothing improper occurred.

I always had another boyfriend as long as I can remember. Hotchy was a neighbor boy that I always knew. I really liked him and sometimes he liked me. One time he took me ice skating in San Diego. Even though I could roller skate I had no luck with the ice skates. I tried and tried to stand up and ice skate to no avail. Hotchy (Charles) lost patience with me and put me on the bus in San Diego with instructions of what to do to get home. I guess it only took one bus as that was no problem. But I misunderstood on when to put my coins in the fare box. I paid as I was getting off and the bus driver said that "It was about time that I paid." I did what I thought I was meant to do. That may have been the end of Hotchy for that year, but there were other years with times as his friend. Once I was in high school we never spent any time together. I often wonder where he is now.

We have a lot of childhood friends that we enjoyed time with for a period of time. Karen and Judy were good friends of my sisters and me. We spent much of our childhood playing with them, not always peacefully. Our imaginations were often in action when we got together. We planned plays or skits with them in their backyard. They lived next door to their grandparents and shared a large backyard with them. They had other relatives nearby too, much like us. We remember Karen and Judy having certain chores to do and their little house was very neat. Karen and Judy were both in the same graduating class as me. We graduated from Coronado High School in 1955. We did not really hang out together much after we were in high school though.

I enjoyed many friendships over the years and am always happy to see these friends again at reunions. One friend that I was close to in high school and for several years afterwards was Joan. I want to be in touch with her again. We have talked on the phone several times, but I never seem to follow through on getting together with her. I hope this will be the year. We are not getting any younger.

Madeline and I have remained good friends all these years. I am ever so thankful. We first met in third grade and we have each had a lot of friends over the years. Yet we have developed an even stronger sister bond as the years pass by. We are sisters in the Lord and that is one reason we have bonded. We are both silly together too. Wouldn't know we are elderly. That is for other people. Her mother could qualify, yet she is a young 94 year old. It is a blessing to have this mother in our lives.

My other mother Rosalie is also 94 years young and a blessing from the Lord. She was born in Coronado and has almost always lived in Coronado. Donna and I both adopted her as a mother. She was also a cupid for Paul and me. Rosalie's father was a Coronado ferry captain in years gone by. Such history our families share.

"More Coronado Memories" could go on and on, but this is time to close this post. There are always more things to write as they come to mind. I think of them faster than I can write. Sometimes they flit away before they reach the keys. See you the next time I sit here. Hugs  :)

Coronado Memories

When we travel through Coronado my family has to put up with me remembering too many details of days past. "See that house, Mom and Dad painted it," or "I baby sat in that house when I was in high school," are comments often heard from me. "I remember being in that house when I was real little. I think my parents knew someone who lived there." I know I can wear their ears out with all these facts. "Do you remember the store that used to be in that location?" is another oft spoken phrase.

Paul often recalls facts from his childhood too. We both grew up in Coronado so between the two of us there is a lot of Coronado history in our heads. Not really enough to write a book about, but our families would be an interesting chapter in a book on Coronado. Actually there is a section on some of the Marvins in one of the Coronado books. Paul's dad responded with some family pictures and facts when one book was being put together. But we could add the Jones and Mc Donaugh family too. I sent one favorite Jones family picture to a book about San Diego. This picture is included in that particular book.

Laura has information about places that my mother painted that I did not even know. Laura spent a lot of time helping her grandmother paint when she was quite young. She remembers Mom painting one mansion that has been in the news lately. I asked her if it was the interior or exterior and Laura remembered it being the exterior. Mom could climb a ladder to paint a two story house if she had to. Mom started painting with Dad back in the forties, soon after the war. She continued until long after Dad died in 1964. She had to earn a living and she was a good worker.

One time I was helping Mom paint inside a house a few blocks from where we lived on F Avenue. It was not long after my dad had died and the children were quite young. The children went nearby to one of Laura's friends to play. I was busy painting and just knew that the children were fine. Well, when Laura came back to where I was I asked her where her little brother was. She said that he would not follow her so she had left him outside the house where I was working. He was not anywhere to be found. Panic time! We rushed home looking for him on the way. Paul was home from work and heard my sob story. He calmly picked up the phone and called the police. When he asked them if they had a kid there the answer was yes.

Paul was able to go to the Coronado Police station and retrieve our little son. He had been found by a very concerned lady and taken to the police. He spent several hours there and seemed none the worse for wear. If it was today and that happened we would not have had such a simple happy ending. I'm sure that other agencies would get involved and we would have to prove that we were fit parents. Was I a fit parent? I think I was, but I could have been a lot better. There are a lot of things that I would improve on. But I do not believe I was negligent. I should have used more sense that day though.

It doesn't take much to dredge up a memory. Just going down that street where I was painting that day so many years ago will bring that story to mind. Just seeing something in the news such as the little girl found wandering in the street in Coronado in the middle of the night will trigger my memory of that day. I am oh so thankful that my story had a happy ending. I certainly hope that the little girl and her adoptive mommy have such a happy reunion. Now days the courts get involved which makes for a long drawn out story. And of course the media have to get involved. My name would have been mud.

Griff continued to have adventures as the years went by. He was an active little boy. Both of my sons could not understand why I was so adamant about them coming down off the two story roof when we lived on Olive Lane. I don't remember how old they were, but they may have been between six and nine years old. And that may have been when I got my first grey hair.

We lived close enough to the beach for the children to enjoy living in a beach community. Laura remembers jumping from rock to rock as she and her friend made their way along Ocean Boulevard. The tide pools in the rocks near Hotel Del Coronado were another place for an adventure for the children. There were walks or bike rides on the Strand as the children got older. That was before there was a good bike path on Silver Strand.

When our oldest daughter was five years old she had an adventure with her little friend. This would have been very unusual as she was always nearby where she belonged. Kathy and her friend walked the whole two blocks to the bay and were found by a nice policeman who brought them home.

Even when the children were barely in kindergarten they were able to walk to school and back home alone once they were shown the way. Now days I would not choose to have children do this, but we lived in a different day and age. I know that some mothers were cautious and continued to walk with their children for several years. One good friend of Laura's always rode on the back of her mother's bike well into grade school. I know a lot of parents are very cautious now days and I understand why.

When the children were quite young they learned the way to their grandparents' homes. I especially remember the first time we decided that Laura was able to walk by herself to Paul's parents' house on the other side of town. Paul's mother and I had it well planned with phone calls and instructions. Laura must have been around half way there when she needed help from a nice lady. More phone calls and arrangements. Laura eventually arrived at her grandmother's house fine and dandy. My kids loved their grandparents, Paul's parents and mine.

My first adventure was told to me as I grew up. When I was a toddler using a walker we lived one half block from my Coronado grandparents. Well my parents must have turned their backs on me and I headed up the hill and across the street to my grandparents' house. Now days this is busy third street, but in those days there was no traffic, thankfully. Families have had stories to share through the centuries and we add our stories to share with the next generations.

Some stories are too sensitive to remember and to share, but they also help to make us what we are. God knows these stories as He knows all about us and He cares for us as a mother hen cares for her chicks under her wings. We can go to the shelter of the Lord's wings. Under His wings I will abide. Safely abide forever.

A Full House

In the early eighties we had a full house with our family and plenty of pets. Our youngest son joined the Marines in 1980 while he was still seventeen years old. Otherwise all of our children were at home and my niece Elizabeth had come for a long visit with her dog Mouse. Originally she was in town to visit her grandmother, but she ended up at our house for five years.

With Kathy, Laura, Bill, Elizabeth, Paul and me plus five dogs and a number of cats we needed every inch of space in our house. It was a good thing we added a room in 1979. We managed to make room for other pets as the years flew by.

One little kitten needed a home when some children found her and brought her to us. When I took her in I said she was just temporary until we found another home for her. Well, her name became Temporary and we had her for fifteen years. She was a sweet little black and white cat. Although she sometimes had a temper so she was sometimes called Temper.

Another found kitten became Elizabeth's kitty. Raven was a pretty black cat. One time she disappeared for a while and came home with a broken hip. We took her to the vet but they didn't need to operate on her. She ended up with her signature limp for the rest of her life. When Elizabeth moved back to her home in Billings, Montana in 1985 Raven went too, as did Mouse, her dog.

On one of our birding trips to Buena Vista Lagoon in the Oceanside area we noticed someone leaving a chicken there to join all the ducks and geese. We decided to catch the young chicken and bring it home. It would not have fared well with all the wild birds. Other people have left pet ducks there and they really shouldn't do that. We got home with our new pet chicken and decided to name it Katy. It was not long before we changed it to Carl as it was a rooster. He grew quite large and would crow in the morning if we left him outside at night.

Paul worked nights so had a routine of catching Carl when he got home at night. Paul would put Carl in a box in the garage so he could not wake up the whole neighborhood in the morning. This routine worked out quite nicely. Carl got taller than our dogs and picked on them. After enough of this our dogs got even. I felt bad when I discovered that one of the dogs had snapped back one time too many. Carl was dead. I could not eat this pet. None of us could.

When Griff graduated from basic training with the Marines we happened to have a lot of family in town. So he had at least one aunt and a number of cousins as well as grandparents and our family at his graduation in San Diego. Then the next day we had a large family portrait taken with my mother and all of her children and grandchildren. Only one of my brothers-in-law was missing in the portrait. In later years we had some other large family pictures taken with different combinations of people.

In 1983 Griff was in Okinawa and life was continuing to change in our family. When Griff left for Okinawa Kathy was single and did not even have a boy friend. By the time he returned home Kathy was married and expecting her first baby. The big wedding was in September of 1983. It was a special time for our family. We had four generations in attendance. John Golden was the lucky guy. We knew John for some time as we knew his first wife and her family for years.

John's son Michael was the ring bearer despite a broken arm. He was a cute seven year old. A friend of theirs was the flower girl. Kathy had two of her cousins, Elizabeth and Debra, and her sister Laura as her attendants at the wedding. Two of John's friends and Kathy's brother Bill stood up with John at the wedding as well as being ushers. Kathy made her own wedding gown as well as the flower girl's dress. Laura and Elizabeth made their dresses. Donna made Debra's dress. There were other personal touches and we prepared all the food too.

So while Elizabeth was with us in San Diego we had a lot going on. We needed her willing hands in preparing for the wedding. Her brother Matthew was here for the wedding and was also a great help. We had friends that also added their special touch to the wedding reception. This was when we were going to Midway Baptist Church so Pastor Baize was the one who married Kathy and John.

Elizabeth was still here when Rebecca Jean Golden was born in 1984. By then Griff was back and had surprised us with his good news. Soon after he was home he shared with us that he was engaged to be married. He brought Josie here from the Philippines that summer. They went to Las Vegas to get married  and Bill went with them. It was dedication on Bill's part because he rode in the back of Griff's truck through the hot desert. We couldn't go as our car needed work done on it. I hated to miss out.

At a later date we had a party for them at Kathy and John's house. I loved my new daughter and we developed a close relationship with each other over the years. I'm sad to say that after about sixteen years of marriage they got divorced. This was even sadder for them. I still consider Josie to be a daughter. She still calls me Mom.

Early in 1985 Elizabeth's parents came to San Diego to take her back home to Billings. Five years was a nice amount of time to really get to know my niece good enough to be a daughter. While she was with us I let her do much of the cooking. Her family have cooking skills that I do not have. She also made birthday cakes and other special desserts for us. She made the cake and cupcakes for the party for Griff and Josie.

With Elizabeth and her cat and dog gone we had less bodies in the house and we missed them. But we had our new little family nearby to visit. I got to baby sit for my new little granddaughter too. That was fun. We also had our son and his bride in the Oceanside area to visit. They were all here for Thanksgiving and Christmas. Actually Elizabeth was still here on Becky's first Thanksgiving and Christmas. By the time Becky had her second Thanksgiving the Goldens were in Washington state. Boy did we miss our little Becky and her parents when they moved away.

It must be getting quiet at our house by now. We only had four of us living here besides the pets. But there are always more pet stories. Later in the decade, I think in 1988, Bill joined the Air Force. Now we are down to just Paul, Laura and me and the pets. In 1989 the Golden family moved back to San Diego so they were nearby again. By this time they had cute little Melissa Joy with them. She was born in August of 1988. They would be in town until John retired from the Navy in 1992.

There were trips to see the Goldens in Colorado to look forward to. There were trips with Bill to enjoy as he likes to travel and go birding with his dad. Each trip has an adventure to share as I put photo albums together. It is a blessing to see our children leave the nest and then continue to share their lives with us. We have more memories to make as time goes by.

first picture- Elizabeth Hamilton and her dog Mouse,
second picture-our kitty Temporary,
next picture- large family portrait with Mom and family,
then the wedding of Kathy and John Golden with four generations-
this picture included most of the family at the wedding.
fifth picture-my sister Betty with her daughter Elizabeth 
& my daughter Laura.
last picture-Michael, Becky and Melissa Golden.

Sharing Our Hearts and Hugs

When I was growing up I don't remember sharing hugs with many people. I'm sure that we would have shared hugs as young children, but I don't remember many hugs. I would have enjoyed this form of affection. We had a lot of interaction as a family in other ways, but the hugs and kisses were missing. I sort of remember Mom interacting in an affectionate way with my youngest sister when we were little. That indicates to me that she probably did the same with my other sister and me when we were younger.

I remember seeing some of my friends giving their parents hugs to say hello or goodbye and thought that was so nice. As a parent it is so natural to hug my children. I guess the busyness of my parents' lives got in the way of hugs and kisses. I don't think they intentionally avoided this ritual. I don't remember much in the way of hugs with grandparents either, but there was always a warm connection otherwise.

The problem is when we start to think any meaningful touching is meant as a girl-boy relationship. I always wanted hugs. I also liked boys so would have loved hugs and even kisses from a special someone. I wonder if I would have been so longing for this if I had the normal hugs from my family. Just a thought.

Paul's mother was totally against parents kissing their children or grandchildren. I don't remember if she was this way about hugs. Yet she was a wonderful grandmother in every way imaginable. She gave so much of herself. She did not like seeing any adults giving their germs to children by kissing them. It was a confusing message for me as an impressionable young mother. I grew up without kissing, yet I really wanted to be affectionate with my children.

Paul's father was quite affectionate as he became a grandfather. This was not how he was when Paul and his brother were little though. He was also affectionate with me as the daughter he never had. Paul followed in his dad's footsteps in that he did not show our children affection. That is what he learned as a child. This goes through the generations. We can change though.

When we were young I don't remember the friendly hugs that people enjoy sharing now days. At church it was a rare occasion for anything more than a handshake. I remember being at a small church in Mexico one time in 1960 where we were greeted with hugs. That is a warm memory. But hugs as a regular Sunday morning greeting was almost unheard of at the churches I regularly attended. Before 1961 we were in the Methodist Church. In 1961 we joined the Baptist Church. We did not usually share hugs at church. It was much later that many brothers and sisters in Christ began being so comfortable with hugging. Of course there were occasional hugs.

We have one special friend that is known for her hugs. We have known Rosalie since we were teenagers  and she has always shared hugs with us. She thought Paul did not really like hugs. I think he did, but had to get used to them. I had to get used to hugs, and I now consider myself to be a hugger too.

I enjoy the warm greetings we share in our churches today. Now days family and friends seem to be comfortable with friendly hugs. Maybe I have just gotten over the idea that hugs are for boy-girl relationships. I think Paul may be getting past that too, realizing that hugs are another way to greet brothers and sisters.

I remember that when I was a teenager one of my friends was surprised that the boy she was with just shook his father's hand instead of hugging him. I would not have thought of that as I don't remember ever seeing a father and son in a warm embrace when I was young. As daughters my sisters and I didn't even hug our parents. That all seems so sad to me now. We all need hugs and kisses and what better place to get them than from our parents?

I eventually got comfortable hugging my mother when she was older. Her second husband used to get upset with me because I did not show Mom affection. My attitude was that is how I was raised so that is how I was. Thankfully I changed over a period of time. Maybe around the time that we started showing more love to each other at church. Not to say we did not love each other, we just needed to be more tender to each other in our families and also our church family. I wish I had overcome that attitude earlier when I still had my Daddy here with me to be able to give him a big hug. I still called him Daddy till the day he died. It was a long time before I stopped calling my mother Mommy. That was our way of showing affection, I guess.

When giving hugs I respect the fact that some people are not comfortable with such greetings. If they prefer a handshake that is also a warm greeting. Just make it gently firm. I do not want to break their hand, but I want to show I care.

I share my heart each day with those I love. I share a smile with those I meet along the way, another way of sharing Jesus' love with others. And when I write a note I put a heart at the bottom of the page to say "you are loved." Otherwise I put my :) on many pages that I write.