Family Beginnings

We had been married nine months and I was expecting our first child when Paul was drafted into the U.S.Army in May of 1955. We were just 18 and 21 years old. I had not yet graduated from high school, but would in just a month. Some may have considered me to still be a child. As far as I was concerned I was all grown up and wanting to be a good wife and mother. We had recently moved into the house that Paul's grandmother had owned. It now belonged to Paul's Uncle Ivor and he rented it to us.

It was so hard for us to say goodbye to each other, after all we were still newlyweds. Paul would be going to basic training at Fort Ord. He would miss my graduation from Coronado High School. I would miss him so very much. I finished high school and was glad to be able to graduate with my classmates. I hoped that I didn't show my pregnancy too much. I probably did though. The baby was due in August, a year after we got married.

I still enjoyed the friendships I had always enjoyed. I have always been blessed with friends. If I had not repeated first grade I would have graduated the year before so wouldn't have been married and still going to school. But I was in the class I was meant to be in with the friends I loved.

Paul and I were faithful in our letter writing the whole two years he was in the Army. I wrote every day. I'm sure he did too when it was possible. We still have these letters someplace in our many collections.

When Paul was finished with basic training his parents and I traveled together to Fort Ord to bring him back to Coronado. I always enjoyed a good relationship with Paul's parents. They were good to me all through the years.

Paul was fair of skin as he was a redhead, so he was very sunburned after being outside so much during basic training. His lips were the main thing that were burned and blistered. His friends wondered if he would still be able to kiss me. That didn't stop us from enjoying our longed for embrace and kiss.

After his alloted time in Coronado he headed back to Fort Ord for continued training. Another sad goodbye for us. More faithful letter writing too. I know it was not easy for Paul to be away and he had a lot to deal with in the Army. But I can't really tell his story. I can only tell my part of the story.

Sometime that summer, before our baby girl was born, my classmates gave me a baby shower. I received everything I would need for our precious little one. We really needed everything so I was very thankful for all the baby clothes and extras.

On Sunday, August 28th the time had come for me to go to the hospital in Coronado. I think it was Paul's parents who took me to the hospital. It was my mother who spent a lot of that long day beside my bed. It was not an easy delivery as the doctor had to use forceps to deliver our baby. Kathleen Jean Marvin was 8 lbs. 1 1/2 oz. and sported a bruised nose after such a difficult birth. She had a large head which is a family trait on her Daddy's side of the family.

Paul's parents got the news to him that he was a Daddy. I was in the hospital for five days as I needed that much time to heal and get my strength back. When Kathy and I left the hospital we went to my parent's house for a few days. But I really needed Paul to be there. This was the only time I ever got weepy after having a baby.

The happiest time for me was when Paul managed to get home, as he had a weekend leave during that period of time. Kathy was a week old then. It was a precious time for Paul and me. But it was too soon when Paul had to head back to Fort Ord.

The next time I saw Paul our baby was six weeks old. It was another quick weekend trip for Paul. Tears were shed when he left as we didn't have any idea when we would see each other again. He would spend eight weeks at Fort Carson, Colorado in a tent in the snow before heading to Fort Lewis, Washington. Next assignment would be Korea where he spent sixteen months. More snow and a lot of hot weather too.

One good thing that happened to Paul was that he ended up being a Chaplain's assistant while in Korea. That didn't happen right away, but it happened. He also played the organ for Chapel services. We didn't have E mail or phone calls in those days. We had to wait for our letters and they were sometimes delayed. Paul was in Korea after the war there, but he was on the DMZ and it could be dangerous. We didn't see Paul from the time Kathy was six weeks old until she was more than a year and a half old. He got home in time for Easter in 1957.

This was a time of getting to know each other all over again. Kathy had to get acquainted with her Daddy that she did not know at all. This was a difficult time as Paul didn't even know how to be a Daddy. This had not been a good way to begin our family. The struggle would continue. I had seen him being so sweet with his new little baby the two times he had seen her. This would have been the picture if he had stayed home. I thought this would be the picture when he got home. It was not so simple as that. I'm sure other families have discovered this too. It was always a challenge to be the family I had so romantically pictured.