As I write I try to keep a positive tone to my words. It has not always been this way. I went through a long dry spell where I could not see the light at the end of the tunnel. This was many years ago and even though I have had struggles in more recent years I try to look at the positive side of life. We are truly blessed with knowing that God loves us and has provided the way for us to enjoy eternity with Him.
If I did not have the Lord in my life at this time I would be wallowing in a self pity party. There are so many things that can overwhelm the soul. As we get older our bodies are wearing out and we need a strong resolve to not give up. At the same time those we love are going through struggles of their own and may need our encouragement. I try to be the one who says the word of encouragement to my loved ones. In the past there were many who helped me along the way.
I had family there for me when my children were young and I needed an extra hand. I don't know how to say this without seeming to be negative about my husband, but I was basically the mother and father to our children. Paul faithfully held a steady job and he was always faithful to me. But I had a very difficult time and went into serious depression for a number of years. Paul did not know how to be the daddy that our children needed. If I said anything he would just say that he didn't do anything. Meaning he did not do anything wrong as far as he could see. I even tried to get help with this situation but had no success.
I did not intend to write about this at this time. I have put my thoughts on paper many times and torn up half of what I put on paper. I am mostly past those hurtful days but they sometimes come back to haunt me. When I see happy families I am jealous and that is not good. I love my husband and my children a lot and want the best for all of them. Thankfully my husband loves the Lord and we share the same values in most ways.
The main thing I wanted to write is about my dear daughter that is going through her own very difficult time. I am able to be most sympathetic and understanding on one hand. But on the other hand I miss having her available to talk to and really be able to communicate with her. She has always been close to me and we can share so much with each other. Problem is I depend on her and she is not well enough to be able to give that much of herself at this time. I am here for her, but mostly I can pray for her. I pray for the Lord to put His healing hand upon her and to put His loving arms around her. Thankfully she loves the Lord and puts her trust in Him.
Not only is my body wearing out, our house is showing it's age and needs a lot of loving care. Over the years we have done our best to do what is needed for the house, but things are multiplying and I need to be a better manager of time and talent. Thankfully Paul keeps the books. But so many things are on my list and not his list. We have sons who do what they can when they are able to be here. I often have a 'honey do list' for at least one of our sons when possible. Actually they each have their own ways of doing for us which are more interesting than what I ask them to do. One son fills our cupboard and refrigerator several times a year. The other son takes us on excursions when he is in town. They are appreciated. They are in my prayers each day.
I need to go to Colorado to see our other daughter and her family. I haven't even seen our great grandson yet. I am missing out on precious moments in time and I can only blame myself. I need to go get my identification updated so I can fly. I will figure out the funds when that time comes. Families are precious and I miss those days when we had our granddaughters here with us. I loved having them nearby when they were little. Thankfully they stay in touch with me on Facebook. I am so glad that they know the Lord.
By trusting in the Lord I get my mind off myself and think on things of greater importance. I can forgive the things which have been negatives in my life. I remember my dear sisters in Christ that were there for me when I was so needy. So many precious moments that I must not forget. How can I testify if I can't share the sad moments that make the happier moments so much more meaningful? Yet there are some things that are buried in the depths of the sea as the old chorus goes.
"Down in the depths of the deep blue sea lie all the sins once charged to me. Buried for time and eternity, down in the deep blue sea." This is how I remember this old song we sang when I first knew the Lord.
Saturday, September 10, 2011
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
September Songs
There is something about September. It was always the beginning of the school year with signs of autumn in the air. We may not have obvious seasons in San Diego but there are small changes that we can be sensitive to. There are trees that change color to remind us of the season that is upon us. The colors are lovely and remind us of the beauty of God's creation.
I am reminded of my grandmother whose birthday was on September 6th. I do not remember the year of her birth, but she was in her eighties when she went to be with the Lord sometime in the sixties. Pearl Elizabeth Davenport, my mother's mother, lived on a farm and took my sisters and me under her wings for a few years when we were little. Grandma and Grandad loved the Lord and each other. They were both loved by family and many friends. Grandma lost her dear husband in the early fifties. We had last seen them right after Christmas in 1949 when I had just turned thirteen years old. Kathy and I got to see Grandma in 1956 when Kathy was one year old. So Grandma saw one of my babies.
On September 6, 1997 we have another time to remember. We were shocked when my brother-in-law Sam Hamilton died suddenly of a heart attack and left my sister a widow on this day in September. Sam was only fifty-five years old. Betty and Sam's children were even more shocked than I was when they lost their Dad. This was also a day the world was remembering Princess Diana as it was the day of her funeral.
My mother's birthday was September 16th. She was a farm girl from Washington state. She came to California as a young lady soon after she graduated from 'normal school', aka teacher's college, a two year school. She had relatives who were teachers so I guess she had been encouraged to consider teaching. In California she accepted the jobs available to her. She was always a hard worker and took a job as a housekeeper. She soon met Gene McDonaugh and they became serious and got married in 1935. They had three daughters of which I am the oldest.
Mom became a widow in 1964 when Dad was only fifty-three years old. She continued housepainting as she had done for many years with Dad. She eventually married her second husband and they enjoyed traveling to see family each year. Mom also helped Frank with selling produce from his truck for a number of years. They knew famous people that they sold produce to, including Desi Arnez. Mom became a widow again when she was eighty years old in 1993. Mom lived until May of 1996, on Mothers Day weekend. Over the years Mom had been everything from a wife and mother to 'Rosie the Riveter', as well as house painting with Dad and selling produce and driving the truck for Frank.
We have other September birthdays in our family including my brother-in-law Fred Guapo. My sister Donna's husband, Fred, will celebrate his 66th birthday on the 24th. It is my pleasure to have Fred as part of our family. Fred is another hard worker and is focused on selling properties in the Los Angeles area. I think he can drive L.A. in his sleep as he not only drives the freeways every day, he grew up in Los Angeles. He is also the father of one son, Freddy.
Donna became a mother September 29, 1957 when her son Arthur Louis Sinclair was born. At that time I became an aunt. A year and a day later Debra Marie Sinclair was born making Arthur be a big brother. Laura fits right in the middle of Arthur and Debbie. She was born in March of 1958. Arthur and Debra and my children were close as cousins can be and spent much time together during the earlier years. Seems like Arthur was often involved in my sons' adventures.
We remember Arthur all through the year especially in the month of his birthday and again in January. He has been missing since January 20th of 1994 when he was last seen. His mother and sister especially miss him. He has children that did not get to know him and are missing a father in their lives. He has a wife who helped Donna report him as missing in 1994. He has a father that I'm sure misses him. He had grandmothers that missed him when he first disappeared. I miss my nephew and I'm sure my children miss their cousin. I'm sure other cousins miss Arthur too.
Arthur and Debra fought and loved each other as siblings do. Even as they fought I'm sure they were the best of friends. They were so close in age that Donna actually had two babies at the same time. One year and a day apart, they were almost like twins. September babies.
Another September baby in our family was our first granddaughter, Rebecca Jean Golden. Kathy and John got married September 3, 1983 and just celebrated their twenty-eighth anniversary. Kathy was twenty-eight when they got married. So she has been married half of her life. On September 27, 1984 Kathy and John welcomed their first daughter, Rebecca. We call her Becky. She will celebrate her twenty-seventh birthday this month. Becky has a big brother Michael and a sister Melissa. Kathy is the step mother of Michael. He was seven years old when his dad married Kathy.
Becky is now married to Jason Van Maanen. We call him Jay. They are the parents of baby Jacob who was born in December.
In September we think of trips to the mountains to see the fall colors. We may have to save our trips to the mountains for October when our son Bill will be here. We enjoy the calls and songs of birds when we are with our son. We also enjoy their colors as they blend into the scenery around them.
September songs can be birthday songs or back to school songs. We have had wedding songs in September also. We have more friends and family with September celebrations to remember. I send some birthday greetings by mail and some by computer. And if I call to give my greetings I may even get brave and sing a song.
I am reminded of my grandmother whose birthday was on September 6th. I do not remember the year of her birth, but she was in her eighties when she went to be with the Lord sometime in the sixties. Pearl Elizabeth Davenport, my mother's mother, lived on a farm and took my sisters and me under her wings for a few years when we were little. Grandma and Grandad loved the Lord and each other. They were both loved by family and many friends. Grandma lost her dear husband in the early fifties. We had last seen them right after Christmas in 1949 when I had just turned thirteen years old. Kathy and I got to see Grandma in 1956 when Kathy was one year old. So Grandma saw one of my babies.
On September 6, 1997 we have another time to remember. We were shocked when my brother-in-law Sam Hamilton died suddenly of a heart attack and left my sister a widow on this day in September. Sam was only fifty-five years old. Betty and Sam's children were even more shocked than I was when they lost their Dad. This was also a day the world was remembering Princess Diana as it was the day of her funeral.
My mother's birthday was September 16th. She was a farm girl from Washington state. She came to California as a young lady soon after she graduated from 'normal school', aka teacher's college, a two year school. She had relatives who were teachers so I guess she had been encouraged to consider teaching. In California she accepted the jobs available to her. She was always a hard worker and took a job as a housekeeper. She soon met Gene McDonaugh and they became serious and got married in 1935. They had three daughters of which I am the oldest.
Mom became a widow in 1964 when Dad was only fifty-three years old. She continued housepainting as she had done for many years with Dad. She eventually married her second husband and they enjoyed traveling to see family each year. Mom also helped Frank with selling produce from his truck for a number of years. They knew famous people that they sold produce to, including Desi Arnez. Mom became a widow again when she was eighty years old in 1993. Mom lived until May of 1996, on Mothers Day weekend. Over the years Mom had been everything from a wife and mother to 'Rosie the Riveter', as well as house painting with Dad and selling produce and driving the truck for Frank.
We have other September birthdays in our family including my brother-in-law Fred Guapo. My sister Donna's husband, Fred, will celebrate his 66th birthday on the 24th. It is my pleasure to have Fred as part of our family. Fred is another hard worker and is focused on selling properties in the Los Angeles area. I think he can drive L.A. in his sleep as he not only drives the freeways every day, he grew up in Los Angeles. He is also the father of one son, Freddy.
We remember Arthur all through the year especially in the month of his birthday and again in January. He has been missing since January 20th of 1994 when he was last seen. His mother and sister especially miss him. He has children that did not get to know him and are missing a father in their lives. He has a wife who helped Donna report him as missing in 1994. He has a father that I'm sure misses him. He had grandmothers that missed him when he first disappeared. I miss my nephew and I'm sure my children miss their cousin. I'm sure other cousins miss Arthur too.
Arthur and Debra fought and loved each other as siblings do. Even as they fought I'm sure they were the best of friends. They were so close in age that Donna actually had two babies at the same time. One year and a day apart, they were almost like twins. September babies.
Another September baby in our family was our first granddaughter, Rebecca Jean Golden. Kathy and John got married September 3, 1983 and just celebrated their twenty-eighth anniversary. Kathy was twenty-eight when they got married. So she has been married half of her life. On September 27, 1984 Kathy and John welcomed their first daughter, Rebecca. We call her Becky. She will celebrate her twenty-seventh birthday this month. Becky has a big brother Michael and a sister Melissa. Kathy is the step mother of Michael. He was seven years old when his dad married Kathy.
Becky is now married to Jason Van Maanen. We call him Jay. They are the parents of baby Jacob who was born in December.
In September we think of trips to the mountains to see the fall colors. We may have to save our trips to the mountains for October when our son Bill will be here. We enjoy the calls and songs of birds when we are with our son. We also enjoy their colors as they blend into the scenery around them.
September songs can be birthday songs or back to school songs. We have had wedding songs in September also. We have more friends and family with September celebrations to remember. I send some birthday greetings by mail and some by computer. And if I call to give my greetings I may even get brave and sing a song.
Saturday, August 27, 2011
Thoughts on August
A year later on August 28th our first baby daughter was born at the Coronado Hospital. Kathleen Jean Marvin weighed eight pounds plus one and a half ounces. She shared my middle name Jean. My dad was known as Gene so my name was partly from him. Kathy was born on a Sunday which is my favorite day of the week.
Since these are my thoughts on August I will get back to my theme. Kathy spent her first birthday with her Grandma and Granddad Marvin and me on the trip we took that summer. We had gone to Washington state to see my grandma and other Davenports there. We were on the way home from Washington on little Kathy's first birthday. Yes, Paul's parents took me on this trip to see my grandmother. They were going to Canada so decided to take Kathy and me to Washington. They were always good to me and were great with their grandchildren.
On Kathy's second birthday I was in the hospital after having surgery. Kathy spent her birthday and many other days with her Grandma and Granddad Marvin. I'm sure my parents and sister Betty would have spent some of that time with Kathy. She was the darling of the family. My parents loved being grandparents as much as Paul's parents did. My sisters loved their role as aunts.
By this time my sister Donna was married and living in Los Angeles with her new husband. They were expecting their first baby by this time. Their baby was expected in September. I was expecting our second baby and she would be born in March of 1958.
We now celebrate another August birthday as our granddaughter Melissa Joy Golden was born August 16, 1988. She joined big sister Rebecca Jean Golden who was born four years earlier in September of 1984. Missy was born on Whidbey Island in Washington state and Becky was born in the Navy Hospital in San Diego. Their Daddy John Golden was in the Navy at the time.
My sister Donna became a grandmother six years before I did. Her first grandson, David, was born August 6th, probably in 1978. My sister Betty's first grandchild was also born on August 6th. Brittany is twenty one this year so she would have been born in 1990.
We have had other August weddings and birthdays over the years. Becky and Jay were married August 8th last year so they recently celebrated their first wedding anniversary. They had a sweet backyard wedding with their close friends and family. I'm sorry to have missed their special day. But Laura and I were at the restaurant with the family when they announced their engagement. Becky and Jay also came to San Diego for their honeymoon so we got to see the newlyweds.
So in August we have many birthdays to celebrate as well as wedding anniversaries to remember. There may not be any holidays in August, but we can celebrate life and love. The next month we also have many loved ones to remember. We are certainly blessed.
top photo- Caroline and Paul
next photo- Paul
last picture- Becky and baby Jacob
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Following Him
When I first came to the realization that I needed to really know God it was an eye opening experience. I did not have a problem with really believing in Him. I needed to learn what it really is to follow Him. I do not know the exact moment I accepted Jesus, but I do know the year that I had changes in my life.
I was twenty three years old and expecting our third child when I became aware of needing a personal walk with Jesus. I could have begun this memorable time just before I was pregnant. But I remember Paul coming home from work with a renewed 'enthusiasm' for the Lord. He had a good friend that was on fire for the Lord and it seemed to have rubbed off on Paul. Paul was already a Christian so this was mainly a time of growth for him. I would have thought I was already a Christian as I had always gone to church and Sunday school.
The reason I remember I was pregnant is because I got the mumps during the early stages of my pregnancy and this was around that time. Paul got the mumps from his friend at work. Paul had them bad and knew to stay home in bed, not like his friend did. I was already expecting our baby at that time. When I got the mumps I only had them on one side but I spent time in bed despite having two little girls to care for. I remember being in bed and beginning to read the large family Bible that we had. Baby steps in being a new Christian.
Kathy and Laura got the mumps around that same time also. With children there always seemed to be times of illness to remember. But reading to them from a favorite set of books as well as Bible stories is what I remember most. Bedtime prayers were always part of the evening ritual. It was also fun to sing the songs we knew from Sunday school as well as other favorites.
Another event that happened when I was pregnant was when Paul and I were baptized in the ocean at Rosarito Beach south of the border. Paul's friend had been baptized there as he had connections with a little church in Tijuana where his wife was from. He made arrangements for us to be baptized down there too. It was a memorable day spent with our friend and his family and friends from the little church south of the border. I do not have photos but it is imprinted in my mind. This was 1960 and Rosarito Beach was completely different than it is today. We had the beach to ourselves near the old hotel that has been there for generations.
We were still in the Methodist church at that time. We were there until our baby boy was a few months old, early in 1961. Over the years we had visited First Baptist in Coronado on occasion when there were visiting evangelists. After we went to hear the evangelist in 1961 we were drawn to our little Baptist church in Coronado. Pastor Lyon was there at that time and we liked him a lot. The people of First Baptist were very welcoming and we decided to join the church that spring. This was a time of growth for us. I enjoyed becoming active there.
Another thing I remember when Paul and I were going through so many changes is wanting to share the message with family and friends. I was awkward at it and all I really accomplished was letting people know that there was something different about me. It took me a long time to be comfortable with this new me. I still struggle on how to share this good news. But it is a part of me and not something to be uncomfortable about. I remember one neighbor and friend who called me a "Holy Roller". That is one thing I never considered myself to be. We did visit Paul's friend's church, which was a Church of God, on several occasions. The church we were baptized through was a Church of God. They are often much more enthusiastic than we are used to although I never witnessed anything different.
People seem to have their own opinions on what it is to be a Christian. Many people think you have to work to be saved, but it is a gift freely given. Some people think that the building will collapse if they enter the door. Of course they are joking. It would be difficult to enter for the first time if you weren't used to going to church. That is one reason churches have special activities that are separate from worship services. People can see that we are friendly and they would be welcome. Other people think that just going to church makes you a Christian. I may have been part of that category at one time. What makes the difference between a believer and a nonbeliever is whether or not you have accepted Christ as your Savior. We need to have Him as the most important part of our lives.
"That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved." Romans 10:9
I was twenty three years old and expecting our third child when I became aware of needing a personal walk with Jesus. I could have begun this memorable time just before I was pregnant. But I remember Paul coming home from work with a renewed 'enthusiasm' for the Lord. He had a good friend that was on fire for the Lord and it seemed to have rubbed off on Paul. Paul was already a Christian so this was mainly a time of growth for him. I would have thought I was already a Christian as I had always gone to church and Sunday school.
The reason I remember I was pregnant is because I got the mumps during the early stages of my pregnancy and this was around that time. Paul got the mumps from his friend at work. Paul had them bad and knew to stay home in bed, not like his friend did. I was already expecting our baby at that time. When I got the mumps I only had them on one side but I spent time in bed despite having two little girls to care for. I remember being in bed and beginning to read the large family Bible that we had. Baby steps in being a new Christian.
Kathy and Laura got the mumps around that same time also. With children there always seemed to be times of illness to remember. But reading to them from a favorite set of books as well as Bible stories is what I remember most. Bedtime prayers were always part of the evening ritual. It was also fun to sing the songs we knew from Sunday school as well as other favorites.
Another event that happened when I was pregnant was when Paul and I were baptized in the ocean at Rosarito Beach south of the border. Paul's friend had been baptized there as he had connections with a little church in Tijuana where his wife was from. He made arrangements for us to be baptized down there too. It was a memorable day spent with our friend and his family and friends from the little church south of the border. I do not have photos but it is imprinted in my mind. This was 1960 and Rosarito Beach was completely different than it is today. We had the beach to ourselves near the old hotel that has been there for generations.
We were still in the Methodist church at that time. We were there until our baby boy was a few months old, early in 1961. Over the years we had visited First Baptist in Coronado on occasion when there were visiting evangelists. After we went to hear the evangelist in 1961 we were drawn to our little Baptist church in Coronado. Pastor Lyon was there at that time and we liked him a lot. The people of First Baptist were very welcoming and we decided to join the church that spring. This was a time of growth for us. I enjoyed becoming active there.
Another thing I remember when Paul and I were going through so many changes is wanting to share the message with family and friends. I was awkward at it and all I really accomplished was letting people know that there was something different about me. It took me a long time to be comfortable with this new me. I still struggle on how to share this good news. But it is a part of me and not something to be uncomfortable about. I remember one neighbor and friend who called me a "Holy Roller". That is one thing I never considered myself to be. We did visit Paul's friend's church, which was a Church of God, on several occasions. The church we were baptized through was a Church of God. They are often much more enthusiastic than we are used to although I never witnessed anything different.
People seem to have their own opinions on what it is to be a Christian. Many people think you have to work to be saved, but it is a gift freely given. Some people think that the building will collapse if they enter the door. Of course they are joking. It would be difficult to enter for the first time if you weren't used to going to church. That is one reason churches have special activities that are separate from worship services. People can see that we are friendly and they would be welcome. Other people think that just going to church makes you a Christian. I may have been part of that category at one time. What makes the difference between a believer and a nonbeliever is whether or not you have accepted Christ as your Savior. We need to have Him as the most important part of our lives.
"That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved." Romans 10:9
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
Seeking God
"I have found the Book of the Law in the house of the Lord." 2 Chronicles 34:15 While reading one of my older Daily Bread booklets I read these words, "During Josiah's reign as king of Judah, he ordered the repair of the temple. In the temple, Hilkiah the high priest found the Book of the Law that had been given to Moses by the Lord. When Josiah 'heard the words of the Law' he felt convicted and later stood before his people to make a covenant to keep all that was written in the book."
"...for great is the wrath of the Lord that is poured out on us, because our fathers have not kept the word of the Lord, to do according to all that is written in this book." 2 Chronicles 34:21
I'm not an Old Testament scholar and won't pretend to take this apart word for word. I can see that when one generation doesn't pass their knowledge of the Word of God to the next generation what is most important will be lost to future generations. I have seen this in my lifetime.
My mother was raised in a Christian home and said that she accepted the Lord as a child. After Mom left home and came to California she must not have found Christian friends and got away from the habit of going to church.
My father was raised by a Jehovah Witness mother and did not really share her belief. She was a dear lady, but held on to her faith in her cult of which she was one of the original 144,000. She tried to get us interested in what she believed but thankfully we did not go that direction. She faithfully went door to door until she was more than eighty years old.
Mom and Dad always sent my sisters and me to Sunday school and we went willingly. We learned Bible stories and enjoyed the songs and fellowship. Mom rarely went to church with us and did not really teach us the lessons that she learned at her mother's knee. We learned to be good in our life's lessons, but did not really learn or hear that we needed to have a personal relationship with Jesus. We did not know "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." John 3:16
There were times that we lived on the farm with Mom's parents and went to Sunday school and church with them. Grandma was also a Sunday school teacher and taught us many lessons at home. If we had always lived with these dear grandparents I'm sure we would have understood the need for the Lord in our lives. We were so young when we were with them. Donna had an extra year with them on the farm and was even baptized during that time.
Since we spent most of our growing up years in Coronado we did not get the lessons from our mother's parents for as long as we should have. We were happy going to the Methodist Sunday school and I'm sure we had good lessons, but I do not remember hearing that we needed to be saved. We would have wondered what we needed to be saved from. We did not know that "all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God." Romans 3:23
We actually could have heard what we needed to know but just did not take it to heart. I do not know. All I know is that I do not remember hearing this lesson.
One thing I can be sure of is that our grandparents were praying for us. God hears the prayers of grandparents. When I read old letters I find from Grandma I see that she was not giving up on us. She always got a good word for what is truth into those letters. We probably just thought that Grandma was preaching again. But we always loved our grandparents, both sets of grandparents. One grandma may have been trying to get us to be involved in her cult. The other one gave us what was truth in her letters to us. Both had our best interests at heart.
As teenagers my sisters and I still went to church and got involved in the Methodist Youth Fellowship where we had friends. These are the friends I was with when Paul and I met. He ended up coming to the Methodist church too. Paul had gone to the Christian Scientist Sunday school as a child. As a teenager he was attracted to the Presbyterian church as he wanted to sing in their choir. I don't know how long he went there before he came to the church where I was. Eventually we both sang in the choir together at the Methodist church.
When we were in grade school the Gideons gave out little New Testaments to many of us. I remember receiving one. Paul received one too. He remembers reading the statement of faith in the little Bible and signing it. That has the date of when he first believed and accepted Christ. He can tell you the date even now. I wish I had a specific date to say exactly when I was saved. It would have been much later than him even though I can't say I ever did not believe in God. I always had some sort of belief, but I needed to have a time that I accepted Christ as my Savior. I just did not realize this.
I remember one time when I was a young mother and a friend called me a good Christian. Well, I said that "I try to be a Christian." When I remember that now I would take that as a sign that I did not really know what it was to be a Christian. How could I know if I had not really heard? I remember other times of not giving the right answer too. When I was a teenager when someone asked me to be specific about what I believed I gave some dumb answer. I can't believe how confused I was. I did not know scripture, yet I had always been in Sunday school.
I was the mother of two young children, and expecting our third, before I realized I needed a personal relationship with Jesus. I don't know the exact moment when I first believed and sometimes questioned myself about this. There have been moments in time when I have gone ahead and reaffirmed that I am a believer. I do love the Lord and look forward to seeing him in heaven someday.
What has bothered me is all the years my sisters and I could have been growing in the Lord, but we were walking in darkness. If Mom had taught us what she learned as a child we could have made personal commitments to the Lord as children. Yes, Donna was baptized as a child when she was with our grandparents and going to their little Baptist church in Washington. How much she really believes in the Lord I do not know. I do not even know if my other sister Betty ever accepted the Lord before she died. This is a sad thing for me. I can hope for miracles and could see her again in heaven someday. Why did I not lead her to the Lord? I spent my time planting seeds, but don't have any idea if they grew. I know her daughter is a believer. Possibly one of her sons is a believer too.
I tried to do my best in raising my children. We always went to church and Sunday school together. I did not have the foundation I needed to be totally effective in what I wanted to do. But my girls are believers, thankfully. Kathy raised her girls with more wisdom than I had. They are also believers. I'm sad to say that my sons still need the Lord. My prayers are always going out for them. I will not give up praying for them.
Will future generations of our family know the Lord? If I had my way they would. My grandmother's prayers did not go on deaf ears. Thankfully I came to the Lord while she was able to hear the good news. Now days so many people walk in darkness and have no belief in God at all. This is such a sad thing for our generation and those to follow. "...for great is the wrath of the Lord that is poured out on us, because our fathers have not kept the word of the Lord..." 2 Chronicles 34:21
"...for great is the wrath of the Lord that is poured out on us, because our fathers have not kept the word of the Lord, to do according to all that is written in this book." 2 Chronicles 34:21
I'm not an Old Testament scholar and won't pretend to take this apart word for word. I can see that when one generation doesn't pass their knowledge of the Word of God to the next generation what is most important will be lost to future generations. I have seen this in my lifetime.
My mother was raised in a Christian home and said that she accepted the Lord as a child. After Mom left home and came to California she must not have found Christian friends and got away from the habit of going to church.
My father was raised by a Jehovah Witness mother and did not really share her belief. She was a dear lady, but held on to her faith in her cult of which she was one of the original 144,000. She tried to get us interested in what she believed but thankfully we did not go that direction. She faithfully went door to door until she was more than eighty years old.
Mom and Dad always sent my sisters and me to Sunday school and we went willingly. We learned Bible stories and enjoyed the songs and fellowship. Mom rarely went to church with us and did not really teach us the lessons that she learned at her mother's knee. We learned to be good in our life's lessons, but did not really learn or hear that we needed to have a personal relationship with Jesus. We did not know "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life." John 3:16
There were times that we lived on the farm with Mom's parents and went to Sunday school and church with them. Grandma was also a Sunday school teacher and taught us many lessons at home. If we had always lived with these dear grandparents I'm sure we would have understood the need for the Lord in our lives. We were so young when we were with them. Donna had an extra year with them on the farm and was even baptized during that time.
Since we spent most of our growing up years in Coronado we did not get the lessons from our mother's parents for as long as we should have. We were happy going to the Methodist Sunday school and I'm sure we had good lessons, but I do not remember hearing that we needed to be saved. We would have wondered what we needed to be saved from. We did not know that "all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God." Romans 3:23
We actually could have heard what we needed to know but just did not take it to heart. I do not know. All I know is that I do not remember hearing this lesson.
One thing I can be sure of is that our grandparents were praying for us. God hears the prayers of grandparents. When I read old letters I find from Grandma I see that she was not giving up on us. She always got a good word for what is truth into those letters. We probably just thought that Grandma was preaching again. But we always loved our grandparents, both sets of grandparents. One grandma may have been trying to get us to be involved in her cult. The other one gave us what was truth in her letters to us. Both had our best interests at heart.
As teenagers my sisters and I still went to church and got involved in the Methodist Youth Fellowship where we had friends. These are the friends I was with when Paul and I met. He ended up coming to the Methodist church too. Paul had gone to the Christian Scientist Sunday school as a child. As a teenager he was attracted to the Presbyterian church as he wanted to sing in their choir. I don't know how long he went there before he came to the church where I was. Eventually we both sang in the choir together at the Methodist church.
When we were in grade school the Gideons gave out little New Testaments to many of us. I remember receiving one. Paul received one too. He remembers reading the statement of faith in the little Bible and signing it. That has the date of when he first believed and accepted Christ. He can tell you the date even now. I wish I had a specific date to say exactly when I was saved. It would have been much later than him even though I can't say I ever did not believe in God. I always had some sort of belief, but I needed to have a time that I accepted Christ as my Savior. I just did not realize this.
I remember one time when I was a young mother and a friend called me a good Christian. Well, I said that "I try to be a Christian." When I remember that now I would take that as a sign that I did not really know what it was to be a Christian. How could I know if I had not really heard? I remember other times of not giving the right answer too. When I was a teenager when someone asked me to be specific about what I believed I gave some dumb answer. I can't believe how confused I was. I did not know scripture, yet I had always been in Sunday school.
I was the mother of two young children, and expecting our third, before I realized I needed a personal relationship with Jesus. I don't know the exact moment when I first believed and sometimes questioned myself about this. There have been moments in time when I have gone ahead and reaffirmed that I am a believer. I do love the Lord and look forward to seeing him in heaven someday.
What has bothered me is all the years my sisters and I could have been growing in the Lord, but we were walking in darkness. If Mom had taught us what she learned as a child we could have made personal commitments to the Lord as children. Yes, Donna was baptized as a child when she was with our grandparents and going to their little Baptist church in Washington. How much she really believes in the Lord I do not know. I do not even know if my other sister Betty ever accepted the Lord before she died. This is a sad thing for me. I can hope for miracles and could see her again in heaven someday. Why did I not lead her to the Lord? I spent my time planting seeds, but don't have any idea if they grew. I know her daughter is a believer. Possibly one of her sons is a believer too.
I tried to do my best in raising my children. We always went to church and Sunday school together. I did not have the foundation I needed to be totally effective in what I wanted to do. But my girls are believers, thankfully. Kathy raised her girls with more wisdom than I had. They are also believers. I'm sad to say that my sons still need the Lord. My prayers are always going out for them. I will not give up praying for them.
Will future generations of our family know the Lord? If I had my way they would. My grandmother's prayers did not go on deaf ears. Thankfully I came to the Lord while she was able to hear the good news. Now days so many people walk in darkness and have no belief in God at all. This is such a sad thing for our generation and those to follow. "...for great is the wrath of the Lord that is poured out on us, because our fathers have not kept the word of the Lord..." 2 Chronicles 34:21
Monday, August 8, 2011
In Remembrance of Those Who Have Died in the Line of Duty
All too often we hear on the news that there has been another shooting in San Diego. Ordinary people enjoying a normal day get caught in the middle of gunfire and are seriously injured or die from their wounds. It has happened to elderly as well as the very young. I do not spend my days in fear as I walk to the bus or through different neighborhoods. We can't spend our life being fearful. But I can understand why someone would be fearful if they have been anywhere near someone who has been shot.
Again our city is mourning the loss of one of our finest. There have been too many police officers shot and killed in the line of duty. The list is long and another name will be added to a memorial this year. This weekend we lost San Diego police Officer Jeremy Henwood. Just last October we lost San Diego police Officer Christopher Wilson in another ambush. The Border Patrol has also suffered loss not too long ago. In 2009 Border Patrol Agent Robert Rosas Jr. was killed while on patrol. And the list goes on and on. Oceanside lost two of their finest in recent years.
I especially remember October 12, 1954 when Coronado police Lt. Frank S. Greene lost his life during a traffic stop. Such things never happened in Coronado! We never heard of policemen being killed in San Diego. The last one that had happened in San Diego county had been in 1933 when a San Diego police officer had been killed. Coronado's Frank Greene was a neighbor of Paul's family on Pomona Avenue. He lived right next door to Paul and his family. He had a wife and teen age son. His son Craig was in my sister's class at Coronado High School. Alice Craig Greene, Frank's wife, was a well known mystery writer. Frank Greene had been a Coronado High School graduate and was a football star while in high school. He even played professional football.
Paul has stories to tell about his good neighbor. Frank taught Paul how to throw a curve ball. Frank also witnessed some of Paul's teen age adventures. One time in the middle of the night at, 2:00 A.M., Paul and a friend were fencing, or at least taking the stance of fencing, in the middle of the street outside of the Greene's home on the corner of 5th and Pomona. This friend happened to be a girl, the older sister of the girl that Paul really liked. Anyway they were having fun and not causing any trouble even though it was a strange hour to be goofing around. They were under the street light for any night owl to see. Paul saw that his good neighbor Mr. Greene was silently watching the show.
It was a shock to have a shooting in Coronado in 1954. It was a bigger shock for it to be someone that so many in Coronado knew. There was a big man hunt for the bad guys and many people have stories to tell of their experiences of that day. Some of my classmates shared their adventures of that day even fifty years later at our class reunion. I think some of them wanted to help catch the bad guys. We were seniors that year. Frank's son Craig was a junior when he lost his father. Our 1955 CHS yearbook was dedicated to Lt. Frank Greene. The dedication page reads--
To this day there is a picture of Frank Greene at the Coronado Police Department. Some time after the new police station was built in Coronado Paul and I decided to go inside and take a look. We especially wanted to see where Frank's portrait was hanging. We asked a policeman where it was and he graciously showed us. We had a very nice conversation with him and it turned out that his family had been our neighbors when we lived on Margarita Avenue and our girls were babies. They lived across the street from us. I had known his parents in those days of the late fifties. Coronado is a small town even if there are more people there now.
There is a Police Memorial at the Chula Vista police station. Paul and I took pictures of it several years ago. I had especially wanted to see Lt. Frank Greene's name on the memorial. It was there along with all of those in San Diego county that had been killed in the line of duty. Sorry to say there will be more names added when we see it again.
As for catching the bad guys that ambushed Frank Greene, Paul remembers that it was someone that we had known who found the bad guys. His name was also Frank, another home town hero.
Again our city is mourning the loss of one of our finest. There have been too many police officers shot and killed in the line of duty. The list is long and another name will be added to a memorial this year. This weekend we lost San Diego police Officer Jeremy Henwood. Just last October we lost San Diego police Officer Christopher Wilson in another ambush. The Border Patrol has also suffered loss not too long ago. In 2009 Border Patrol Agent Robert Rosas Jr. was killed while on patrol. And the list goes on and on. Oceanside lost two of their finest in recent years.
I especially remember October 12, 1954 when Coronado police Lt. Frank S. Greene lost his life during a traffic stop. Such things never happened in Coronado! We never heard of policemen being killed in San Diego. The last one that had happened in San Diego county had been in 1933 when a San Diego police officer had been killed. Coronado's Frank Greene was a neighbor of Paul's family on Pomona Avenue. He lived right next door to Paul and his family. He had a wife and teen age son. His son Craig was in my sister's class at Coronado High School. Alice Craig Greene, Frank's wife, was a well known mystery writer. Frank Greene had been a Coronado High School graduate and was a football star while in high school. He even played professional football.
Paul has stories to tell about his good neighbor. Frank taught Paul how to throw a curve ball. Frank also witnessed some of Paul's teen age adventures. One time in the middle of the night at, 2:00 A.M., Paul and a friend were fencing, or at least taking the stance of fencing, in the middle of the street outside of the Greene's home on the corner of 5th and Pomona. This friend happened to be a girl, the older sister of the girl that Paul really liked. Anyway they were having fun and not causing any trouble even though it was a strange hour to be goofing around. They were under the street light for any night owl to see. Paul saw that his good neighbor Mr. Greene was silently watching the show.
It was a shock to have a shooting in Coronado in 1954. It was a bigger shock for it to be someone that so many in Coronado knew. There was a big man hunt for the bad guys and many people have stories to tell of their experiences of that day. Some of my classmates shared their adventures of that day even fifty years later at our class reunion. I think some of them wanted to help catch the bad guys. We were seniors that year. Frank's son Craig was a junior when he lost his father. Our 1955 CHS yearbook was dedicated to Lt. Frank Greene. The dedication page reads--
In the praise of Lt. Frank Greene there just isn't enough that can be said of his loyalty, courage, devotion to duty and his service to his "home town." Through the thousands of peaceful nights while we slept, Lt. Greene cautiously and diligently made his rounds in his prowl car in search of marauders. To this departed former student of C.H.S. and a true friend to all we say thanks for a job well done. To the memory of Frank Greene we respectfully dedicate this 1955 Beachcomber.
To this day there is a picture of Frank Greene at the Coronado Police Department. Some time after the new police station was built in Coronado Paul and I decided to go inside and take a look. We especially wanted to see where Frank's portrait was hanging. We asked a policeman where it was and he graciously showed us. We had a very nice conversation with him and it turned out that his family had been our neighbors when we lived on Margarita Avenue and our girls were babies. They lived across the street from us. I had known his parents in those days of the late fifties. Coronado is a small town even if there are more people there now.
There is a Police Memorial at the Chula Vista police station. Paul and I took pictures of it several years ago. I had especially wanted to see Lt. Frank Greene's name on the memorial. It was there along with all of those in San Diego county that had been killed in the line of duty. Sorry to say there will be more names added when we see it again.
As for catching the bad guys that ambushed Frank Greene, Paul remembers that it was someone that we had known who found the bad guys. His name was also Frank, another home town hero.
Wednesday, August 3, 2011
This Heart is For You
Sometimes things get too much for me and I start to feel sorry for myself. Challenges keep adding up and I need a reminder to make lemonade out of those lemons. I do not like paperwork, but I need to find some missing papers. Paul is usually in charge of such things, but sometimes I hang on to something only to misplace it. That is just the tip of the iceberg.
While I was enjoying the fresh air, hanging up the clothes on the clothesline and trying to forget the cares of the day, God gave me a reminder of his love for me. I looked down and there was a beautiful heart shaped leaf. Sometimes the eucalyptus leaves do form into heart shapes. This one was there especially for my pleasure.
I like hearts and use one with my signature on cards and letters. I found a cute little heart shaped rock in my mother's many belongings after she died. I still have it on my dresser in a container with other small treasures. I found a red heart shaped glass crystal piece while walking in our neighborhood one day. I guess I still have it someplace. It is fun to pick up small treasures while on a walk. You can find pennies and other change as well as marbles and other small items.
In the Bible we read,"Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon the earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break in and steal: But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." Matthew 6:19-21
I try not to put too much importance on the treasures here on earth as I know that they can be taken from us so quickly and they are not of eternal value. We are actually trying to not hang on to things too tightly and want to thin things out. Yet pretty things are nice to have, even if only for a moment in time. Most important is what we do that is of eternal value. Are we prepared to meet the Lord? Are we touching other's lives for the Lord? I want to share my love for Jesus with those people I care about, my friends and family. I pray that each one I love will know and love the Lord. :)
While I was enjoying the fresh air, hanging up the clothes on the clothesline and trying to forget the cares of the day, God gave me a reminder of his love for me. I looked down and there was a beautiful heart shaped leaf. Sometimes the eucalyptus leaves do form into heart shapes. This one was there especially for my pleasure.I like hearts and use one with my signature on cards and letters. I found a cute little heart shaped rock in my mother's many belongings after she died. I still have it on my dresser in a container with other small treasures. I found a red heart shaped glass crystal piece while walking in our neighborhood one day. I guess I still have it someplace. It is fun to pick up small treasures while on a walk. You can find pennies and other change as well as marbles and other small items.
In the Bible we read,"Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon the earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break in and steal: But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal: For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also." Matthew 6:19-21
I try not to put too much importance on the treasures here on earth as I know that they can be taken from us so quickly and they are not of eternal value. We are actually trying to not hang on to things too tightly and want to thin things out. Yet pretty things are nice to have, even if only for a moment in time. Most important is what we do that is of eternal value. Are we prepared to meet the Lord? Are we touching other's lives for the Lord? I want to share my love for Jesus with those people I care about, my friends and family. I pray that each one I love will know and love the Lord. :)
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)